Skillful Negotiation

From the Sun and Moon Tarot, the Sun; from the Wisdom Keepers Oracle, Diplomacy:

          Clarity, energy, and contentment - how could a day get any better? Unfortunately, the Diplomacy card (which represents the 6th hexagram of the I Ching) suggests that the happily skipping duo are about to run into an obstacle. No matter how sincere our motivations, we all eventually are faced with opposition or conflict. Rather than trying to bulldoze our way over the problem, this card encourages us to be patient and open-minded. The first step in doing this is taking the advice of Frances Kissling: "You have got to approach differences with this notion that there is good in the other." Perhaps they see an area that we've overlooked or have personal experience dealing with certain situations where we have only book knowledge. By inviting them to the table for a conversation, we gain a fuller, more complete perspective.

Once you label me you negate me.

~Soren Kierkegaard

Skillful Compromise

This week I'll be using the Sun and Moon Tarot, created by Vanessa Decort and published by U.S. Games. I'll also be drawing from the Wisdom Keepers Oracle, created by Rosy Aronson and published by Seal Pup Press. Today's draws are the Seven of Wands and Aspiration:

          Decort describes the Seven of Wands as 'confrontation without compromise,' which doesn't seem to have any wiggle room. Now if that means we stick to our personal values without being willing to cross any ethical lines, that sounds wise. But sometimes when people disagree with our plans or ways of doing things, we take it personally. We confuse disapproval of our strategy as a judgment of our merit and worth rather than simply a difference of opinions and ideas. Yet having opposing views just means we have dissimilar preferences and has nothing to do with our value as a person. The Aspiration card refers to a strong desire to do something, but it is different from a goal in that it is ongoing and has no final destination. For instance, a person may aspire to be more kind and forgiving. Added to the Seven of Wands, we might consider whether, in our battle for what we want, we've lost sight of what's important. As Richard Rudd stated, "Greed is an energy that will compromise its own integrity in a flash to get what it wants, and this is its downfall."

Seeing Beyond

From the Hoi Polloi Tarot, the Nine of Swords; from the I Ching Pack, Water over Earth (hexagram 8):

 Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere.

— Erma Bombeck

          Worry and anxiety can make us feel like we are using our energy to find a solution, but really all we are doing is focusing on the problem. We have no traction, spinning in the same spot. The problem is that we can be so used to living life a certain way that we can't imagine what it will look like any other way. Water over Earth (hexagram 8) suggests mutual help and united action. We may need the perspective of others to see beyond our dark clouds to the blue sky that lies beyond them.

The Set of the Sails

From the Hoi Polloi Tarot, the Three of Wands; from the I Ching Pack, Mountain over Mountain (hexagram 52):

          This fellow is waiting for his ship to come in. Judging by the three staffs leafing out, effort and action are about to produce a result. Many folks wait on ships without doing or changing a thing, as if wishing hard will make it happen. This man would tell us not to wait for fate to intervene or good fortune to arrive at our doorstep - we need to get things moving. But once we've put things into play, the outcome is often out of our control. Mountain over Mountain (hexagram 52) represents stillness and patiently waiting. If what arrives at the dock is not what we wanted, we can rethink our plan, learn from our mistakes, and do things differently next time. 

One ship sails East,

And another West,

By the self-same winds that blow,

'Tis the set of the sails

And not the gales,

That tells the way we go.

~Ella Wheeler Wilcox

Challenging Assumptions

From the Hoi Polloi Tarot, the Three of Cups; from the I Ching Pack, Fire over Water (hexagram 64):

          "You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with," Jim Rohn once stated. Does our group inspire, challenge, and encourage us? Or do they think just like we do, having the same opinions and beliefs about most things? There is an illusion of safety with sameness, but there is also stagnation. If adversity finds its way to our door, wouldn't it be better to have those around us who saw things a bit differently from us, and therefore might be able to add to our potential solutions? The Fire over Water hexagram is assigned the keyword 'transition.' It alludes to a time when things seem chaotic and confusing because we are dealing with something we haven't dealt with before. That eclectic bunch of friends could offer us support and a tether as we ride out the rapids. The churning waters won't last, but it's nice to know someone is keeping an eye on us.

Differences challenge assumptions.     

~Anne Wilson Schaef

Wide Open

From the Hoi Polloi Tarot, Judgment; from the I Ching Pack, Earth over Earth (hexagram 2):

          We all live life inside our little box of assumptions, personal beliefs, and opinions. We feel some degree of control and smugness there, thinking we know what's what. But at some point, those boxes get pried open and we experience a 360-degree view of life very different than what we thought we knew. It's like the reporter who idealizes a soldier's life along the lines of Captain America until he goes into the war zone himself. As much as we'd like to crawl back into those cozy, complacent boxes, they just don't fit anymore. The Earth over Earth hexagram emphasizes receptivity, not in a defeatist way, but with an attitude of devotion and quiet, enduring strength. Seeing reality clearly without wanting to hide or explain it away is not always easy, but it's easier to deal with it when our eyes and minds are wide open.

Instead of getting better and better at avoiding, learn to accept the present moment as if you had invited it, and work with it instead of against it, and making it your ally rather than your enemy.

—Pema Chodron

Allies Acknowledged

From the Hoi Polloi Tarot, the Six of Wands; from the I Ching Pack, Wood over Mountain (hexagram 53):

 This is the person you think is your antagonist, who ends up being your greatest ally: the person who pushes, criticizes, and challenges you to meet a standard of excellence you might not otherwise achieve. ―Bonnie Hammer

          It's nice to feel like we've accomplished something or successfully met a challenge. It's even nicer when we remember all the people who encouraged us and helped us along the way to get to this point. Those laurel wreaths belong to them as much as anyone else. Hexagram 53's key phrase is "Growing Slowly," which fits well with the elemental name of Wood over Mountain. A tree on a mountain gets the worst of all the weather; it needs some nurturing and protection to survive. That fellow riding triumphantly on his horse should show appreciation to his comrades and keep them close. What has been planted will need more than one person to help care for it as well as those with the knowledge and skill to do it. 

I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers - so many caring people in this world. ― Fred Rogers