Non-contractual Companionship

From the Bonefire Tarot, the Three of Cups; from the Day of the Dead Lenormand, Fish:

          There are people who offer us solace as well as celebration, honesty as well as support, and insight as well as laughter. These relationships are not contractual - if you do this, I'll do that - but are based on love and compassion. It is a fellowship that doesn't enable; it helps us stay sane and on an emotionally even keel. The Fish card represents abundance, and in its pairing with the Three of Cups, it is a reminder that such friendship is wealth indeed.

You won’t understand what I mean now, but someday you will: the only trick of friendship, I think, is to find people who are better than you are—not smarter, not cooler, but kinder, and more generous, and more forgiving—and then to appreciate them for what they can teach you, and to try to listen to them when they tell you something about yourself, no matter how bad—or good—it might be, and to trust them, which is the hardest thing of all. But the best, as well.

― Hanya Yanagihara

Emotional Unrest

From the Bonefire Tarot, the Eight of Cups; from the Day of the Dead Lenormand, the Moon:

          This man is leaving a relationship that has some history. From the outside, all the flowers in bloom and the full cups indicate that things are good. But the space between the cups on the top symbolizes that something is missing. Perhaps the relationship was superficial, appearing great on the outside but empty and insincere in reality. The Moon represents a time when emotions are brewing beneath the surface, but clarity has not arrived. The light will eventually shine in dark corners, but for now, trying to logically analyze feelings and others' motives will just send the mind down rabbit holes that won't be very helpful. Better to let the feet follow one's intuition.
          I can't help but apply these cards to what has been happening in the U.S. over the past few days. Slavery might have ended years ago, and white people might argue that 'all lives matter,' but that is a superficial and ignorant view of how most black people are forced to live day-to-day. Many wagging fingers keep pointing at the 'thugs' looting and burning cities (although these people are likely not protesters but people just taking advantage of a bad situation); blame is a convenient way to avoid acknowledging one's own faults and dealing with the underlying problems. Come on America, we can do better.

Not Typical, But It Works

This week I'll be using two self-published decks: The Bonefire Tarot by Gabrielle Angus-West (now released by Schiffer) and the Day of the Dead Lenormand by Edmund Zebrowski. Today's draws are the Queen of Coins and Garden:

          The epitome of practicality meets creative genius in the form of the Queen of Coins. She nurtures people through physical forms. The Garden, a card of gathering and good times, should be right up her alley. But how does this happen in a pandemic, where park gatherings get dispersed by the police? This Queen would probably quote Einstein: "One should never impose one's views on a problem." In other words, stop trying to fit what you want in a box of how it should be and instead just open up to how it is. Expectations and preconceived ideas will always shrink possibilities down to thimble-size. My husband and I had our own garden party with his sister and husband in their driveway this weekend. We spaced our chairs apart and all wore masks, and I brought them a big vase of hydrangeas from our yard. The breeze was blowing and the conversation enjoyable. It wasn't typical, but it was still fun.

Saturation Sickness

From the Motherpeace Tarot, the Four of Cups; from the Toltec Oracle, Koyolshauki:

 Craving creates tunnel vision: we see only what we yearn for.

—Joan Duncan Oliver

          A moment of fear, anger, loss, or jealousy can be fed until it saturates our life, becoming a constant background of anxiety, a regurgitation of resentment, a heavy burden of grief, or an obsession of lack. The Four of Cups shows a woman trying to cleanse herself of such emotions; rather than continue to drink from the same jugs, she chooses a fresh stream. Koyolshauki - the Moon - warns us to carry the light of consciousness into the darkness as we cleanse our minds. There's work to do when it comes to emotional baggage. Our hands and minds fit those handles well after years of holding it, and familiarity can be a hard thing to let go of. Those emotions have gotten us through some tough times (or at least they seemed to help), but now they have become more like an addiction that keeps our lives tightly constricted. In the words of Gail Brenner: "It all boils down to a simple truth: resistance brings suffering; acceptance and openness bring ease."

This May Sting...

From the Motherpeace Tarot, the Seven of Wands; from the Toltec Oracle, Malinalli:

          Here in this Seven of Wands is what is supposed to be the celebration party after the victory of the Six of Wands. I'm guessing they can't agree on what happened to who and when. The victor may get to write the history book, but some will rightly question his or her motives. In today's world, those who have felt unheard or treated unfairly have social media to air their side of things. Malinalli literally means 'twisted herb' and refers to the ability of plants to heal or poison. It asks if I am regurgitating blind beliefs or following the trail of truth. Truth, like rubbing alcohol, may sting when first applied, but it can help wipe out infection and heal.

Enough

From the Motherpeace Tarot, the Four of Discs; from the Toltec Oracle, Tlawiskalpantekutli:

          Seeing this woman close herself up inside her hut made me think of the phrase "wouldn't give me the time of day." The booklet suggests this card is about putting up boundaries when it comes to our finances, time, and energy.  It's easy to get overwhelmed by the constant demands of the people around us. Yet the Lord of Light - referring not to the Sun but that which creates a spiritual awakening - implies that we should take a closer look. It's easy to point the finger at 'them,' but have I trained these folks to always expect my help? Have I secretly enjoyed being Wonder Woman? What was the motive for my generosity? When I find the root of my behavior, I will surely understand the fruits it has produced. Rather than become a miser, I can dig up that root and plant new seeds.

Coldheartedness and narrow-mindedness are not the kinds of habits we want to reinforce. They won’t predispose us to awakening; in fact, they will keep us stuck. ~Pema Chodron

Different Keys on the Ring

From the Motherpeace Tarot, the Six of Wands; from the Toltec Oracle, Koatl:

          Besides the usual meaning of victory, the booklet also suggests the Six of Wands is about becoming a leader. There have been more leaders in the history of the world than can be counted, but what defines a great leader? Jonathan Sacks wrote that while a good leader might create followers, a great leader creates leaders. Such a person has the humility and wisdom to know they won't live forever; if they want important principles and values to be carried on, they must prepare and educate the next generation, not subjugate them. Koatl (Snake) is akin to Jung's shadow self, especially the positive side. Normally, we consider certain traits to be weaknesses (like being shy, for instance), but Koatl (who must crawl rather than fly) is a reminder that even weaknesses can be turned into strengths. A good leader doesn't look for only a certain type of person to form his or her posse, but sees the advantages of diversity. A mixed group means a wider perspective, a variety of skills, and broad knowledge, which leads to a bigger keyring to unlock many doors.