Look for the Doorway

From the RainShadow Tarot, the Eight of Cups; from the Liminal Spirits Oracle, Time:

It’s in relationships that our unresolved psychological issues show up most intensely. 

~John Welwood

When our relationships get out of balance or when our emotions are jerking us around like a choke chain, we often attempt to deflect or distract ourselves. We might decide to use affirmations, read a self-help book, or go to a wellness seminar. Yet as therapist Mindy Newman explains, what we're really trying to do is avoid looking at the painful emotions we're experiencing in the present and the patterns that have been going on in the past that we're repeating over and over again. Healthy change is going to require some hard, uncomfortable work; we face our suffering and look at its causes and effects without getting entangled in the mental stories around it. Time reminds us that we can't jump ahead to the good part. The inner work progresses at its own pace.

Don't spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door.

~Coco Chanel

Taking Time

From the Mary-El Tarot, the Knight of Cups; from the OH Cards, Time/Anger:

To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind.

~Theophile Gautier

Each of the knights of tarot are on a quest to find a particular Grail; the Knight of Cups seeks the one that serves the heart. To see and serve with the heart means that we see the potential for good in everyone. What has been done in the past does not mean the future will be the same. Life can sometimes wear down the sharp, jagged edges of people. We don't need to open ourselves to harm, but we can recognize that even the lotus seed begins its growth in the muck and mud. The Time and Anger cards, however, indicate that we've applied our personal timetable on such change. Yet impatience, expectations, perfection and frustration all grow from the mind. They deplete our energy and cloud our judgment. These are the moments we can practice developing patience, which begins in the heart.

Patience is taking the time to love what is difficult to love.

~Zenju Earthlyn Manuel

Metacognition

From the Tarot of Pagan Cats, the King of Swords; from Brownie Wisdom, 'Time:'

          In this wintry landscape, I can imagine the King of Swords saying, "Just the facts, ma'am." Does this mean he cares more about justice and less about kindness? I don't think so. I'm currently taking a class taught by Joan Halifax called 'Compassion at the Edge.' She speaks often about metacognition - the awareness and ability to understand one's mental processes. Instead of riding the roller coaster of the mind, we step off and watch its twists and turns, high points and low points. We come to recognize our particular preferences and prejudices as well as how emotions and memories can bias us. From this vantage point, we can make rational choices rather than reactive ones. However, the Brownie Wisdom card reminds us that time won't stand still, so we can't sit and watch our mental gymnastics forever. We have to use the information we have to make the wisest decision we can at the moment.

My Best Thinking

From the Tarot of Pagan Cats, the Ten of Swords; from Brownie Wisdom, Time:

          As the cobwebs on the altar show, we can get stuck in a certain viewpoint. In 12 Step rooms around the world, there is a phrase heard often: "My best thinking got me here." My ego is great at coming up with all kinds of strategies to solve my problems, yet it often keeps me in a rut and makes things worse. To borrow from the mind of Einstein, a new kind of thinking is essential. I need to empty my cup of solutions and allow it to be filled by a new source. Judging by the stardust swirling in the night sky, it appears this cat agrees. The Brownie suggests time is a factor. I might want to lay on my bed of nails and feel sorry for myself, but what will that accomplish? It won't make me feel better or change anything - self-pity just keeps me stuck in a circular mindset. Time to listen to another's wisdom besides my own.