"E" is for Effort

    This week I'll be using the Tarot of Dreams by Ciro Marchetti.  Today's draw is the Nine of Wands:

Someone give this guy a nudge and tell him to "Wake up!"  I do understand how he feels; he's put in a lot of effort to get to the goal, but the challenges just keep coming.  I've been on a health regimen for the past few months - walking six days a week and counting calories.  And though I've been very disciplined about it all, I think I'm only losing about 1/4 pound a month.  There are days when I feel like this guy, and think, "What's the use?"  But like the wands behind this fellow, I can look back and see that even though the weight is not coming off as fast as I would like, I do feel better physically and feel better about myself for making the effort.  No, I won't give up, but I do occasionally need to look at the progress I've made to encourage me to stay in the game.

     The oracle deck I'll be using this week is called MentorSpirit by Kathy Tyler and Joy Drake.  It uses color and fractals, combined with one keyword, so I'll be playing it off my tarot card draw for the day.  This morning's draw is "Release:"

What is it I need to release?  I need to let go of my expectations for one thing.  If I am going to get fit and healthy, it's going to require that four letter word: time.  And even though the weight is coming off slower than a snail's pace, at least I'm heading in the right direction.  I also need to release those "shoulds" that keep hounding me - "You should exercise more.  You should eat less."  I know that I'm doing all I can right now, and that if I crank things up any more I'll probably not keep it going.  I'd prefer to enjoy life while I'm doing this, not suffer through it.

Truth or Fiction?

   From the Tarot of the Masters, the Tower:

I know this is supposed to be a tower, but I can't help thinking of those models of volcanoes we made in elementary school.  Remember the ones that you would put baking soda inside and then would pour in vinegar for the "eruption?"  Like these volcanoes, sometimes it only takes one added ingredient to disrupt the rigid ideas I hold.  Last night I was reading a post by a woman who is a spiritual teacher, and whom I have held in high regard.  Many of my ideas parallel hers, and so I was quite upset to read what she wrote (it basically amounted to tearing down others without applying the same scrutiny to herself).  Today I feel a bit in limbo, questioning all my views and beliefs, and wondering if there is any substance to any of them...

     From the Key to the Kingdom comes the "Six of Clubs:"

The cheetah, my dearest, is known not to cheat;
The tiger possesses no tie -
The horse-fly of course, was never a horse -
The lion will not tell a lie.

The last line of this poem says, "There is no truth in these things at all."  This card reminds me that all humans wear masks, no matter how wise and enlightened they think they might be.  Can a leopard change its spots?  Not really, but it doesn't have to go around pretending it doesn't have any.

Focus and Persistence

  From the Tarot of the Masters, the Youth of Coins (Page of Pentacles):

   

This young person is often associated with studies and learning new things.  In the image above, the girl is wrapped in a cloak with a scarf covering her head, implying that in order to focus, sometimes I need to keep out as many external distractions as possible.  Our society is known for the emphasis it puts on multitasking and the ability to keep several projects going at once.  I admit, there are times when life drops several things in my lap at the same time, but if I'm going to commit to delve into something deeply, I need to concentrate on it rather than fifty other things competing for my attention if at all possible.

     From the Key to the Kingdom comes the "Two of Clubs:"

Little Robin Redbreast sat upon a tree, up went pussy cat, and down went he;
Down came pussy and away Robin ran;
Says little Robin Redbreast, 'Catch me if you can.'

I've watched the feral cats in the neighborhood trying to catch their supper, and while they might miss the bird (or mouse) nine times out of ten, those that persist eventually have something to eat.  This card reminds me of two things - first to persevere in whatever goal I'm pursuing, and second to make sure what I'm chasing is a reality and not some shadow of it.

Enticements

From the Tarot of the Masters, the High Priest (Hierophant):

An elderly priest offers blessings and hands off a paper of doctrinal authority.  When I was much younger, I had a button that read "Question Authority" (and although the counter-culture would like to take credit for it, Ben Franklin said it first).  Don't get me wrong, I think there is wisdom to be found from elders, traditional teachers, and from sacred writings, but I don't intend to swallow one spoonful without looking at it carefully.  Just because the term "spiritual" or a religious label is used doesn't mean that there's not a human agenda behind it.  In fact, there usually is.

     From the Key to the Kingdom comes the Ace of Clubs:

Bat, bat, come under my hat, and I'll give you a slice of bacon;
And when I bake, I'll give you a cake, If I am not mistaken.

This verse prompts me to be aware of how others can entice me into a relationship or situation that is not going to be in my best interests.  These groups or people know how to use fear: "You don't won't to burn in hell forever do you?" "I can promise you that you'll never have to worry about financial security again."  Their sincerity seems genuine, but like buying a car, it's best to check under the hood first.

Stages and Choices

From the Tarot of the Masters, the Hanged Man:

There are times when my life gets turned upside down; things that I originally deemed necessary to give all my energy and attention suddenly seem unimportant.  At first I fight for control, thinking that somehow I can fix this person or situation, but I find myself powerless.  I usually go through Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.  It is this last stage, acceptance, where I can find peace of mind without emotional attachment (as with depression).  If I can find my way to this place, it can have a profound impact on my heart and mind.

     From the Key to the Kingdom deck comes the "Two of Hearts:"

"The Big Baboon is found upon the plains of Cariboo. He goes about with nothing on (A shocking thing to do). But if he dressed respectably and let his whiskers grow, how like this Big Baboon would be to Mister So-and-so!"  ~ Hilaire Belloc

First, a few definitions:
instinct - a complex pattern of behavior embedded in the genes which cannot be overridden by will.
reflex - an involuntary movement in response to a stimulus.
drive - motivation to take action (goal-directed behavior).
Yes, we homo sapiens are humans, and we are also animals.  But I can't blame my bad behavior on my animal nature, because it comes from drives not instincts or reflexes.  If I want to give up my cognitive self-awareness and ability to choose, I might as well go hang out on the plains of Cariboo.

Feeling 4ish

From the Tarot of the Masters, the Four of Cups:

Obviously those three bourbon and cokes haven't shaken this woman out of her funk; perhaps she should try the cup of coffee hanging over her head.  I am reminded by this card that when I feel out of sorts and I want to feel better, I need to try something different than what I've been doing.  In his companion book, Ricklef suggests concentrating on our spiritual core rather than distracting ourselves with things external.  Today, I'll choose to do at least one thing differently than what I normally do...

     From the Key to the Kingdom deck comes the "Four of Clubs:"

"I am a gold lock. I am a gold key. I am a silver lock. I am a silver key. I am a brass lock. I am a brass key. I am a lead lock. I am a lead key. I am a monk lock. I am a monkey."

I am reminded by this card that there is usually a solution for every problem, but the solution needs to fit the problem.  Buying myself a book from Amazon probably isn't going to solve my financial problems, and going to see a movie isn't likely to help me lose weight.  The key must be relative to the lock...

All That Glitters...

From the Tarot of the Masters, the Nine of Cups:

Here's the king of the manor sitting butt-naked (as we say in the South) in all his glory.  He and his family are doing their best to live up to the saying, "eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die."  Now I'm all for having fun, but I do know that any kind excess is going to come back and bite me in the behind, whether it's an upset stomach or a credit card bill.  I can't help but think of the children's story The Emperor's New Clothes, where the king would rather believe a lie that made him feel "better than" rather than accept reality.  In the end though, he had no choice but to open his eyes.  So today I will enjoy myself, but I'll also keep in mind that if I overindulge, no one's going to pay the price but me.

     From the Key to the Kingdom deck comes the "Joker:"

"Will you walk into my parlor?" said the Spider to the Fly, "tis the prettiest little parlor that ever you did spy; the way into my parlor is up a winding stair, and I have many curious things to show when you are there."  "Oh, no, no," said the little Fly; "to ask me is in vain; for who goes up your winding stair can ne'er come down again." ~Mary Howitt

I wish I could say that was a wise fly who listened to her gut, but unfortunately the rest of the poem tells a different story.  The spider uses charm and flattery and eventually gets his meal.  This card reminds me to watch people's behavior and trust my intuition instead of just listening to silky-smooth words.  All that glitter and bling is rarely worth what you end up paying for it.