Paranoia to Possibility

From the Tarot of the Masters, the Fool; from the Key to the Kingdom, the Joker:

Rather than assuming you will know how people will act, take a deep breath and open yourself to the possibility that today is a new day. —Yael Shy

          The Fool asks us to move from distrust to charitable assumption, from paranoia to possibility. For anyone who's taken a beating from life, this may be hard advice to swallow. Survival mode is hard to replace with optimism. But perhaps we can try to be curious and open rather than absolutely sure Armageddon is on the horizon. The Joker card is paired with a verse by Mary Howitt about a spider attempting to trick a fly by inviting it into its parlor. The Joker warns that while we can be open-minded, we don't have to shelve our discernment. We must learn to listen and observe through an unfiltered lens. In the words of Kenneth Copeland, "Sometimes you can tell what something is by what is isn't."

Interment

From the Tarot of the Masters, Death; from the Key to the Kingdom, the Four of Clubs:

          A fresh grave has been dug; now all that waits is the interment. What is it that needs to be buried, that needs to be let go of so that it can be recycled into something else? What freedom of mind awaits when that last shovelful of dirt is packed back in the hole? The Four of Club's verse is based on a children's song of call and response. One child says, "I am a gold lock," and another says "I am a gold key." It progresses through many metals until the last line (meant to trick the responding child): "I am a monk lock; I am a monk-key." Like the song, it is tempting to deceive ourselves so that we don't have to face reality and the endings that come with it. Yet as Norman Fischer wrote, "Acceptance is not resignation. Acceptance is a lively engagement with conditions as they are."

Balance of Darkness and Light

From the Tarot of the Masters, the Three of Cups; from the Key to the Kingdom, the Jack of Spades:

          Everyone has a personal way of meeting life's ups and downs: some depend on a spiritual foundation, some develop a keen sense of humor and gratitude, a few may depend on the arts or nature, and others find purpose in community-based altruistic activities. But one thing's for certain - not many people find emotional stability without a few supportive friends by their side. The Jack of Spades is illustrated with a depiction of Jack Frost, a personification of wintry weather. He is said to make the leaves change colors and leave frosty fern-like patterns on windows. Yet he also brings the bitter nip of icy cold to faces, fingers, and toes. He is a good representation of life's mountains and valleys, both the wonders and hardships we experience. Thank goodness for friends who can help us balance the darkness with light.

A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked. – Bernard Meltzer

Clean Out Our Own Houses

From the Tarot of the Masters, the King of Swords; from the Key to the Kingdom, the Four of Diamonds:

          This King makes wise decisions because of his objectivity (notice the tall chair he sits upon) and love of truth. He'd much rather see reality clearly than paint it with rainbows and fluffy bunnies. The verse assigned to the Four of Diamonds tells of a cat who won't catch mice or rats but doesn't hesitate to enjoy catnip and a goldfish or two. I'm sure if you asked him about his behavior, he'd attempt to distract you with gossip about the other cats in the kingdom. Then the King of Swords might offer up a Buddhist slogan: Don't ponder others. The habit of pointing out the deficiencies of others is just a ploy to avoid looking at our own. Even the King has a bookful.

It’s important to remember that until we straighten up our own lives, we probably won’t be that much help to anyone else. —Clancy Martin

Monitoring Motives

From the Tarot of the Masters, the King of Wands; from the Key to the Kingdom, the Three of Hearts:

          The King of Wands has a clear vision of what he wants, and the confidence and charisma to lead his people in that direction. Sitting on the edge of his throne, he's not content to sit back and let everyone else do the work. He knows that he will have to be involved if things are going to stay on track and get to the finish line. The Three of Hearts verse reads:

"Three darts a tanner guv'nor,"

Was the fairground barker's call.

"Stick three spots to win, sir."

But out the darts would fall!

Unintended betrayal will result in anger or heartbreak, but being the target of the long-game of intentional deceit always feels especially harsh. Better send a memo to this King: Don't get so caught up in your vision that you forget to match the words with the actions of those around you.

Chasing Pleasure

This week I'll be using the Tarot of the Masters, created and self-published by James Ricklef. (I'll also be referring to Ricklef's Tarot Affirmations book.) The oracle deck I'll be using is The Key to the Kingdom, a set of transformational cards and companion book created by Tony Meeuwissen and published by Running Press. Today's draws are the Lovers and the Six of Spades:

 But until a person can say deeply and honestly, "I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday," that person cannot say, "I choose otherwise."

― Stephen R. Covey

          The Lovers shows a young man making a choice between a sultry, fun-loving woman and another who appears overly modest and more serious. If he lets his decision be made by his hormones, it's a no-brainer. The verse for the Six of Spades is by John Gay and inscribed on his monument in Westminster Abbey:

Life is a jest,

And all things show it;

I thought so once,

But now I know it.

Gay obviously realized that the moment we are born, we begin to die. The evidence is all around, but if our attention is absorbed by self-pleasure, we likely won't notice. That's not to say we shouldn't enjoy the bit of life we've been allotted, but perhaps we should consider the intentions behind our day-to-day choices if we'd rather have contentment and joy rather than simply chasing pleasure. 

Leaning In

From the Songs for the Journey Home Tarot, Wave Awakening (Knight of Cups); from the Raven Cards, Two in One:

The next time you lose heart and you can't bear to experience what you're feeling, you might recall this instruction: change the way you see it and lean in. Instead of blaming our discomfort on outer circumstances or on our own weakness, we can choose to stay present and awake to our experience, not rejecting it, not grasping it, not buying the stories that we relentlessly tell ourselves.

~Pema Chodron

          This Knight who is willing to dive into the waters of his emotion seems to take Chodron's advice. I could never quite understand what she meant until I had to live it. Her teaching encourages me not to hide from my emotional surges, but to experience their physical nature without tying it to any mental storylines or preferences. In this way, I can stand in the moment, let the surge dissipate and then respond with awareness and discernment. The Raven Card suggests we each have something in us that is of a spiritual essence. I do believe that there is such a seed or thread in every created being, yet I don't believe it has anything to do with religion. It is where our true goodness and wisdom lie, where we understand our interconnection with others. When I am in the midst of an emotional surge, it reminds me that I am not alone.

Work and Wonder Time

From the Songs for the Journey Home Tarot, the Eight of Earth (Pentacles); from the Raven Cards, 'Grasp It:'

          These young folks are honing their various skills and talents, from designing and baking to painting and exercising. Some of us make our way in the world by becoming Jacks and Janes of all trades while others seek a specific career. It consumes us in our younger and middle years, but later we may find that while having money in the bank gives us security, it doesn't necessarily bring us joy. The Raven Card implies that we each have something innate that does, whether it's creating or enjoying the creation. It's usually different for everyone, but worthwhile for us to discover and spend time doing.

The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.     

~Bertrand Russell

Thinking, Doing

From the Songs for the Journey Home, the Three of Flames (Wands); from the Raven Cards, 'Think Big:'

          The Three of Wands/Flames shows the same lady juggling eggs. When we want to try to expand our horizons or take advantage of some new opportunities, we may imagine what that would look like and how we would accomplish it. Once we find a workable strategy, we can employ it. But the Raven Card warns us not to let any unwarranted fear sink our ship. No one would give the advice to "Think small, start big," but that is exactly how fear corrupts our mind. We are so anxious that we can't imagine any sound strategy, but we impulsively jump in deep water anyway. The lady in the Three of Wands would suggest we think big, come up with several alternate plans, and wear a life vest.

One must live the way one thinks or end up thinking the way one has lived.

 — Paul Bourget

Darkness Turned Back

From the Songs for the Journey Home, the Sun; from the Raven Cards, 'Blessing:'

Like the joy of the sea coming home to shore,

May the relief of laughter rinse through your soul.

― John O'Donohue

          The Sun is symbolic of a time when life blesses us for our courage and tenacity during tough times; fear is replaced by receptivity and confusion with clarity. That feeling of wearing lead boots while slogging through knee-deep molasses wanes and is replaced with a cheerful lightness and energy. While it may be tempting to soak up all this goodness in solitude, the Raven Card suggests we double our time of grace and good fortune by blessing another. A kind, compassionate gesture, no matter how simple, radiates joy on both the bestower and receiver. 

 Somewhere, out at the edges, the night

Is turning and the waves of darkness

Begin to brighten the shore of dawn.

The heavy dark falls back to earth

And the freed air goes wild with light,

The heart fills with fresh, bright breath

And thoughts stir to give birth to color.

― John O'Donohue

Cutting Strings

This week I'll be using Songs for the Journey Home, a deck and book set created and self-published by Catherine Cook and Dwariko von Sommaruga. I'll also be using the Raven Cards, an oracle created by Gabi Bucker and published by AG Muller. Today's draws are the Seven of Flames (Wands) and 'Wellspring:'

Right this very instant, when you’re

Under the spell of mistaken perception

You’ve got to watch out.

~Patrul Rinpoche

          This fellow cuts the strings that have pulled his mind and emotions to and fro. While it would be easy to assume other people and circumstances are the causes of our defensive posture, often it is simply the committee in our head. We've all been shaped and conditioned through our experiences, resulting in a mental steering committee that is constantly telling us what is good or bad and what we should or should not be doing. But is this a skewed perception of reality? The Wellspring card suggests there is a place in our mind that doesn't cling to preferences and prejudices but opens to possibilities instead. We find this spaciousness when we relax and let things be, allowing our mind to observe instead of judge. This unconditioned mind enjoys equanimity, without any strings to jerk it around.

Burning Down the Tower

From the Shadowscapes Tarot, the Tower; from the Cedar Runes, Elhaz/Algiz:

 The real treasure begins in the breaking... Only when impermanence is fully apprehended do we really have the chance to serve, to give without bargaining.

—Bonnie Myotai Treace

A seed is planted and a strong tree grows. But it loses its normalcy and health as it is taken over by others and used to form a tower. Yet no matter how formidable it may seem, it can not bypass the law of impermanence. It feels like my governor (who just passed an executive order stating that no local government can pass a mask mandate) and the White House are intent on burning down everything just to make a point. My reaction is to find my own flame thrower, but Elhaz encourages a different strategy. Named for elk's sedge, which is sharp on both edges and can easily cut, this rune symbolizes protection. It is not aggressive or vengeful, but the patient type that protects what is important, stays rooted, and eventually replants a healthier version of itself. 

Running with Foxes

From the Shadowscapes Tarot, the Knight of Wands; from the Cedar Runes, Kenaz:

This adventure-loving knight doesn't want to chase after foxes, he'd rather run with them. He enjoys all the twists and turns they take as he's not a straight line kind of guy. "Change is afoot!" he yells gleefully, "so stay light on your feet and keep your ears and eyes open." Kenaz means 'torch,' and much like the Knight of Wands, it can bring energy and warmth or burn everything down. A day full of energy and enthusiasm is a good day if that surge can be appropriately channeled. Charge ahead, but have a plan that is adaptable.

Hellish Inner Landscape

From the Shadowscapes Tarot, the Four of Cups; from the Cedar Runes, Nauthiz:

 Hell is real, but it's not the biblical hell. It's the hell of those who get lost inside themselves.

― Marty Rubin

Everyone occasionally gets in a blue funk, though for different reasons. Some compare their lives to another's and feel they've been given a raw deal; either they don't have things as good as they think they should, or they feel like life has been unfairly hard on them. Other folks may have worked hard but were left with expectations unmet. A dark dissatisfaction with life can be created when we feed the funk, regurgitating and re-swallowing the past over and over. Nauthiz means 'need' or 'necessity' - in this case, the need to stop thinking so much about ourselves and think of someone else for a change. This kind of self-care seems paradoxical, but even some small act of kindness will remind us that we are not alone.

Valid Questions

From the Shadowscapes Tarot, the Eight of Swords; from the Cedar Runes, Wunjo:

You become your own prisoner as you watch yourself sit there

Wrapped up in a trap of your very own chain of sorrows

 ~John Prine, "Bruised Orange"

The hummingbird above the swan counsels her to stop fighting the thorns and instead be still and observe them. When I ground my emotional energy, I can then ask myself some questions and understand the situation with more clarity:

1. Is this truly my business or my responsibility?

2. Am I exaggerating any part of this situation? Am I projecting my assumptions about an unknown outcome?

3. Am I making this more important than it actually is? Where should it be on my list of priorities?

4. What part of this situation am I powerless over? What part do I have control over?

5. What skillful, wise action (or attitude change) would benefit this situation?

Wunjo indicates joy, including a positive mental outlook and a healthy emotional state. I can often find joy when I realize freedom lies in questioning the validity of my own thoughts.

Asshats and Angels

This week I'll be using the Shadowscapes book and deck set published by Llewellyn. The artwork is done by Stephanie Pui-Mun Law and the book is written by Barbara Moore. I'll also be drawing from a set of Cedar Runes; The Serpent and the Eagle by Chris Travers will serve as an accompanying text. Today's draws are the Five of Swords and Othila:

          I often think of the aggressive fellow in the Five of Swords as a rebel without a cause - someone who fights with no clear end goal to achieve other than to win. Moore describes his actions as "steeped in the battles of self-interest and power." Basically, he engages with others to build and stoke his ego: "Look at me, I'm right, I'm smarter, and I'm stronger." Meanwhile, everyone else sees only a narcissistic asshat. Othila is often translated as 'ancestral estate,' but Travers suggests it alludes to an ancestral responsibility, such as a king who passes the scepter to his son to serve the kingdom or a philanthropist whose children take over his foundations created to care for the welfare of others who aren't as fortunate. What's the difference between the asshat and the king/philanthropist? The first judges himself as separate and better than others. The king and philanthropist consider themselves honored and blessed to be in their position, and they feel they should be generous to others because they are a part of the family of humanity.

Home isn't where you're from, it's where you find light when all grows dark.

― Pierce Brown

Upward Spiral

From the Restored Order Tarot, the Universe; from the Oracle of Kabbalah, Lamed:

 Lamed painting by Dani Antman

          The door of completion opens on the Universe card; some level of skill and understanding or some goal has been reached. The androgynous figure holds two wands and acts as a connector, both receiving but also sending. What has been gained is meant to be returned to life in some fashion, not hoarded. Lamed means to learn (and alternately to teach). Ginsburgh suggests its towering form (which rises above the upper line of script) symbolizes an aspiration to understand. Yet this aspiration is rooted in the heart, not motivated by selfishness or self-centeredness. Keep moving and learning, Lamed tells the figure in the Universe card. If your heart is in the right place, more will be revealed.

Always take the high road, it’s far less crowded.~ Charlie Munger

Cup of Kindness

From the Restored Order Tarot, the Knight of Cups; from the Oracle of Kabbalah, Pei:

 Pei painting by Dani Antman

          This Knight always takes a little ribbing because he's so romantic and sappy. But right now, I think we all could use a cup of kindness. Pei fits right in with this idea; it means 'mouth' and refers to communication. In several mythologies, the world is spoken into being. Lately, I've been reminded by how much words affect my personal world. No matter how pleasant my day, all it takes is one cutting remark for me to forget my joy. Perhaps if I can remember how it feels when I'm on the receiving end, I'll be more careful with my words, whether verbal or written. Right (Wise) speech in Buddhism encourages me to say only what is true, to speak in ways that promote harmony, to use a gentle tone, and to speak mindfully so that what I say is useful. Or, in the words of Otis Redding, "try a little tenderness."

Act, Love, Walk

From the Restored Order Tarot, the Two of Swords; from the Oracle of Kabbalah, Yud:

Yud painting by Dani Antman

          Decisions, decisions... Discerning choices can be difficult to make for several reasons: our desires get in the way of reality, our opinions override facts, or our emotions hijack rational thought. Cognitive dissonance (conflicting ideas and attitudes) may require us to have a sit until all those noisy, internal voices quiet down. Yud, often translated as 'hand,' is given the title Infinite Point by Ginsburgh. In geometry, the point begins all figures, whether it becomes a simple straight line or the complex spiral of a nautilus shell. Our choices also hold this power, but in what direction should our point go? Perhaps Micah 6:8 holds a clue, as it encourages us to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly.

In-depth Examination Required

From the Restored Order Tarot, the Devil; from the Oracle of Kabbalah, Tet:

Tet painting by Dani Antman

 We must hold still in the midst of our burning thoughts, our anxieties, our fears, and our emotions. We must remember to settle into our bodies and allow them to do the knowing, the resting, the connecting to the earth beneath us. We have a chance now, while the world has stilled, to feel the wind and the sun, to walk outside in the rain, to notice the small, yellow faces of dandelions emerging from the mud. We have a chance to remember what matters in this fleeting, fragile life – our connections, our loves, our families, friends, communities and our host, this endlessly beautiful and constantly changing Earth. —Elizabeth Monson

          What do we do to outrun fear? Some of us find oblivion in drugs and alcohol, distraction in buying and consuming, or deflection in channeling our anxiety into rage. These 'solutions' are the Devil; patterns of behavior that we slide into and then find ourselves chained to destructive habits. Tet offers an alternative. Ginsburgh describes this letter as representing hidden goodness. It is a reminder that even among tragedy, hatred, cruelty, and hardship the light of good can be found if we look hard enough.

Don't Forget...

From the Restored Order Tarot, the Queen of Cups; from the Oracle of Kabbalah, Tav:

          The Queen of Cups is often portrayed as a counselor because her intuition and empathy help her understand others in a meaningful, beneficial way. This particular woman looks exhausted; there's a reason good therapists have a therapist of their own. Tav means a seal or impression, such as a fossil found in limestone. The Sefer Yetzirah (The Book of Creation) states, "Their end is embedded in their beginning and their beginning in their end." As Tav is the last letter of the Hebrew alphabet, it signifies culmination but also a passage to something else. The Queen holds the answer in her own cup - she needs to drink from it too, rather than just filling other cups.

Self-care is never a selfish act—it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others. ~Parker Palmer

Spending Patterns

From the Tarot in Restored Order, the Ace of Pentacles; from the Oracle of Kabbalah, Samech:

 

Samech painting by Dani Antman

          There is a reason for the path leading beyond the archway in this Ace. How I choose to spend my resources now (including time) will determine what I find later on down the lane. The letter Samech means 'support;' Ginsburgh gives it the title of 'Endless Cycle.' What kind of cyclic foundation have I built with my habitual behaviors? When I repeat an action, it becomes easier to fall into a pattern that occurs over and over, for better or worse. It can sometimes be a shock to read the words in the photo by my bed at night:

This night your days are diminished by one.

Do not squander your life.

Fair Shake

This week I'll be using the Tarot in de Herstelde Orde (Tarot in Restored Order), created by Rob Docters van Leeuwen and Onno Docters van Leeuwen; it was published by Servire. The second deck I'll be drawing from is the Oracle of Kabbalah, a deck and book set created by Richard Seidman and published by Thomas Dunne Books. As an added resource, I'll be using The Hebrew Letters by Rabbi Yitzchak Ginsburgh. Today's draws are the Knight of Swords and Dalet:

 Dalet painting by Dani Antman

In our world, there are people who act as philosophers (who like to investigate and discuss the truth), judges (who slice away deception so that truth is clearly seen), and knights (who defend and uphold the truth). Knights of the Sword are moved to action, especially where righting wrongs are concerned. These are the folks who risk bodily harm, loss of freedom, and insults to their character to protest and work for change. Thank goodness for their courage; their actions are often what wake others from their complacent cocoons. Dalet means 'door,' and Ginsburgh suggests it represents a sense of selflessness that comes from recognizing that none of us permanently possesses anything. The door of Dalet is the gateway to humility. Through it, we find kinship with others rather than focusing on the things that separate us. The selfless courage of this Knight, idealistic and impulsive as he might be, is based in the belief that everyone deserves a fair shake at life.

Humble Packaging

From the Druidcraft Tarot, the High Priestess; from the Druid Animal Oracle, the Wren:

 People often hope that meditation will be the answer to their problems. They look to it as a kind of home improvement project, as a way of fixing a broken aspect of themselves.

~Mark Epstein

The High Priestess encourages us to open to the depths and stillness within to find wisdom and strength. But our inner landscape is what may prevent us from finding those treasures. As Mark Epstein explains, "we have to carefully pick our way through our own wilderness. If we can put our minds into a place of surrender, we will have an easier time feeling the contours of the land. We do not have to break our way through as much as we have to find our way around the major obstacles. We do not have to cure every neurosis, we just have to learn how not to be caught by them." Over time, we learn to experience reality rather than react to it; such clarity is what brings strength and wisdom. The Wren brings to mind a quote from A Midsummer Night's Dream: "Though she be but little she is fierce." Meditation may seem passive and ineffectual, but like this bird, its payoff can be mighty.