The Secret is...

From the Fey Tarot, the Three of Swords; from the I Misteri della Sibilla, the Seven of Diamonds (Baby):

          The loss, pain or betrayal this fey has experienced has become tattooed on his trunk; it is a part of his self-identity. Everyone has met people like this (and probably have been that person at some time or other): the widow/widower whose sole focus is the person they lost, the divorced spouse who can only talk of the affair, the person laid off from a job they've had for years, etc. They have become hooked by their experience, reliving it over and over again. Defining oneself by one situation or circumstance can narrow our world considerably. We become our focus. This is why so many people are careful with their labels and say things like, "I am a cancer survivor" or "I'm a recovering addict." The Seven of Diamonds warns that there is a need for boundaries and discipline. My first thought when I saw the baby with the plate of fruit was, "Those grapes are choking hazard!" Just as babies require guidance, we do as well when we are stuck in negative mental patterns. It helps to have someone to be accountable to - a therapist, spiritual mentor, or honest friend - who can help us find a more positive way of re-framing our experience. As Pema Chodron explains, "Don’t get caught in the content: observe the underlying quality—the clinging, the desire, the attachment."