Sharing Secrets

From the Tarot de St. Croix, the Empress, and from the Archetype Cards, the Fool:

 Since I'll be on the road for a few days, I'll be doing a shortened version of my usual blog for a while. The Empress creates in order to nurture, and her nurturing is fueled by emotion rather than logic. I leave for my mom's today, then we'll travel north together for the 90th birthday of her cousin. I am honored that she wants me as her companion - this woman has traveled to over 52 countries, so traveling in the States is a piece of cake for her. Our journey will give us a chance for us to catch up on each other's lives, to laugh and reconnect. The Fool card may suggest that this will be a time to reveal more of ourselves to each other, rather than hiding behind emotional masks. Everyone has their secrets, sometimes even more so with a parent.

Quiet Mind, No Slime

From the Tarot de St. Croix, the Four of Swords:

I had a good chuckle when I drew this card. Today is crunch time, as I make pet schedules, water plants, and pack for my trip tomorrow. "Take a rest from your busy mind," the booklet tells me. Well, as much as I hate to admit it, she has a point. But because I feel that restlessness that often comes before doing something, a sitting meditation is probably not going to do me much good. Lately though, I've been doing a walking meditation where I chant. Now this isn't a "Julie Andrews twirling and singing" kind of thing; I do chant out loud but softly. Lately it's been the chant Lokah Samastah Sukhino Bhavantu, Sanskrit for “May all beings everywhere be happy and free from suffering.” I sing to the birds, trees and people in the houses I pass on my walk. But today I will also include myself.

From the Archetype Cards comes "Femme Fatale:"

Choosing this card made me feel like I got slimed. The femme fatale (literally "fatal woman") is simply a master manipulator. And what a perfect way for someone to pull me from my Zen moment in the Four of Swords than to be so needy I can't resist. George Simon lists three behaviors of manipulators: concealing motives, knowing the vulnerabilities of the victim, and having no qualms about being ruthless. Seeing this list might make me a little more wary and reconsider who really needs me and who just wants to use me.

Cave Contemplation

From the Tarot de St. Croix, the Hermit:

A woman holding an aspen staff emerges from a cave. The creator states this card is about contemplative solitude and coming face-to-face with one's shadow. Contemplation means marking out sacred space so I can view something with continued attention. That "something" is myself - my thoughts and actions. The focus centers on my blind beliefs, ideas I have accepted as truth that are anything but. I also look at my actions; my misconceptions have undoubtedly triggered behaviors that have not been beneficial for anyone. This is not an exercise in self-absorption, but a way toward transformation. The aspen staff represents community (these trees spread by shoots from their roots, creating a cohesive grove). My time spent alone is not meant as an escape, but to help me live among others with clarity and compassion.

From the Archetype Cards comes the "Judge:"

I can evaluate myself very harshly, and I find it much easier to list my character defects than my assets. But the Judge reminds me that I should look at my whole self with fairness and objectivity. If I can do that with myself, I am more likely to have a balanced view toward others.

Starry Gardens

From the Tarot de St. Croix, the Ten of Wands:

Only in the darkness can you see the stars. ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

A tired, young man moves from the scorching heat of the day into the cool, starry evening. And look at the wand in his hand - it's sprouting leaves! Normally I read this Ten as having too much on my plate or carrying a load that isn't meant to be mine. But this version feels like a struggle with purpose, an effort with a good intention behind it. Life can deal us plenty of cards we wouldn't have chosen for ourselves, and we don't always have an option to fold our hand. I have had moments like this, when I felt like I was going to implode under the pressure while dealing with stuff I couldn't ignore. And just when I thought I couldn't take one more moment, I would experience a deep peace. I would suddenly realize that no matter how things worked out, it would be okay. My ego got out of the driver's seat and allowed my Higher Self to take over. As Nelson Mandela said, "It always seems impossible until it's done."

From the Archetype Cards comes the "Artist:"

Poets and painters, dancers and musicians, writers and craftspeople have learned to channel those soul-searing times into their art. They use whatever medium they work with to symbolically express and work through their feelings and thoughts. But even more important, they may tap into an inner resource that gives them strength and inspiration. Then they may begin to believe the words of the Sufi poet Hafiz: "This house of sorrows will become a garden, do not grieve."

Sip from the Cup

From the Tarot de St. Croix, the Ace of Cups:

I see several symbols in this simple Ace card. A full moon creates a continuous flow of strong ocean waves. The sea water is salty and reminds me of tears. The ocean reflects much of life - we find ourselves in a calm place, then suddenly a wave comes crashing down around us. But that moon shines on everyone; the emotions I feel are the same as those of people around the world. It's not personal, life just happens. But standing in the waves is a champagne flute filled to the brim. I connect champagne with celebration and joy, and so I see this glass as a testament to all the love and goodness in life. It is there waiting to be noticed and sipped from, even though waves crash all around it.

From the Archetype Cards come "Shape-shifter:"

Wondering how Myss defined "consciousness," I came across this quote by her: "Consciousness is a relentless practice of being honest with self." In dealing with the emotions, I must not pick and choose but look at all that arises. Otherwise I'm going to be trying to sit on an over-stuffed suitcase that I keep trying to close; eventually it will explode. It is hard to sit with emotions, both mine and other people's. Yet in this card Myss states there is "potential in everything," which perfectly reflects the Ace of Cups above.

Clean Up Your Own Backyard

From the Tarot de St. Croix, the Knight of Pentacles:

This fellow is quite literally a "Greenman." Unlike the RWS Knight of Pentacles who looks over a plowed field, the St. Croix Knight sits in a field of flowers. Even after all of his hard work, he still seems to have (ahem) "staying power." He may be resting from his labors, but I'm sure his mind is thinking about the water and soil needs of his plants. Just because he's seeing results doesn't mean he'll neglect his duties. His cousin knights (of wands, swords and cups) don't have much tenacity when it comes to seeing things through from beginning to end, but this guy is diligent and unwavering.

From the Archetype Cards comes the "Exorcist:"

I'm guessing Myss didn't have Linda Blair in mind when she added this archetype. The emphasis on looking at your own destructive impulses made me think of an old Elvis Presley song titled Clean Up Your Own Backyard. In other words, before I start pointing out other folk's defects, I need to take a good look at my own. The Knight above is very detail-oriented, which is normally a good thing. But sometimes he can be stubborn and rigid about his ideas. I've found myself sitting in this seat lately, and I don't like it. I can get so caught up in my definition of how something is supposed to be, I shut out the views of other. I need to exorcise myself of this habit, otherwise my world is going to shrink to a very small size.

Gathering Sunflowers

This week I'll be using the Tarot de St. Croix, a deck and mini-book set created and self-published by Lisa de St. Croix. Today's card is the Nine of Pentacles:

Occasionally when I choose a card, I'll have a random-seeming thought that flits through my brain when I see it. This morning it was "Plant your own garden." The woman seen on the Nine of Pentacles is often described as self-sufficient and financially independent, yet she takes time to enjoy life - the arts, friendships, hobbies and causes close to her heart. Her life revolves around more than just the daily grind. It is easy for me to get caught up in the day-to-day machinery so that I forget to live. In a few days, I'll be leaving town to go to a family member's 90th birthday. I'm so consumed with making sure pets and people will be taken care of while I'm gone, I feel no excitement about the trip at all. I know things will be handled - maybe not like I'd do it - but still, the world won't stop spinning. Time to gather and nourish myself with my own sunflowers.

The oracle deck I'll be using this week is the Archetype Cards, created by Caroline Myss and published by Hay House:

Growing up, I was raised in a fundamentally religious household under stepdad number one. Women and girls were to be submissive and of service. Hedonists? Not by a long shot. But I bet you can guess what happened when I went off to college. I raised so much hell I almost died from it. So I've experienced both extremes of this card, and neither were healthy or fulfilling. Yet Myss counters that having an appetite for life and enjoying its sensual pleasures is normal and necessary, not sinful. What use is all this beauty if I don't pause to appreciate and revel in it?