A Time to Withhold

From the Touchstone Tarot, the Four of Coins; from the Waterhouse Oracle, Penelope and the Suitors:

Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others. — Brené Brown

There is a time to generously give and a time to withhold, especially when it involves our health and energy. Yet there are those of us (especially women) who have been trained to 'be nice' and make our lives an offering to anyone. But this is impossible if we don't take care of our own needs first. As Anne Lamott advocated, 'No' is a complete sentence. Penelope, in this Waterhouse painting, sits at her loom while she tries to ignore her suitors. During Odysseus' long absence, unmarried young men began to suspect that Odysseus died in the Trojan War. To keep them at bay, Penelope told them she would begin courting again after she finished weaving a funeral shroud - which she unraveled every night. Some people don't accept 'no' without an explanation, so we need to be ready to give them one, even if it is simply that we are exhausted and must rest.