To Bring Back

From the Spirit Within Tarot, the Ace of Cups; from the Answer Deck, 'Anxiety:'

It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living. – F. Scott Fitzgerald

          There is something special about meeting someone and feeling an instant connection that tells you, "Yes, this could be the beginning of a great friendship." At first it may seem to be based on shared ideas, hobbies or experiences, but usually there is something deeper that tugs at the heart. For me, it is a feeling of being at ease, knowing I only have to be myself (and allow the other person to do the same). Of course the initial meeting is really the easiest part. The Anxiety card represents what the care and keeping of a relationship in the long term can bring up. No matter how much people enjoy each other's company, differences will arise. How they are handled can sink or keep the relationship afloat. The Latin root of the word 'relate' means 'to bring back.' What is it that I bring back? I bring back openness and honesty, forgiveness and kindness, encouragement and compassion.

First Response

From the Millennium 2000 Tarot, the Ten of Swords:

For some reason the red sash draped across this man's legs reminded me of a matador de toros, or killer of bulls.  Like the matador, sometimes I think I hold all the weapons, and I will bait people with words to draw them out and prove their ignorance.  But a sharp tongue and intellect don't always work out in my favor, and I can end up gored, bleeding out on the ground.  Bullfighting disgusts me to the point of physical illness; perhaps that is the image I need to think of the next time I consider waging a war of words with someone.

From the Success Cards comes "Anxiety:"

    "My anxious morning mind is like a young dog out for a walk.  Every tree and every bush must be investigated to find out who's peed there and what the news is."
~ David Rynick

Anxiety can make me do one of two things - either I hide my head in the sand and pretend not to see it (particularly if it is a real problem) or I react stupidly and irrationally.  It's like some alien life form has take over my brain, and I lash out at life, frequently making things much worse than they were.  It's hard to just sit with those anxious feelings and realize they are there because reality is not meeting my expectations.  It's okay to have the feelings, I just don't have to let them dictate how I'll respond.