Meaningful Change

 

Sometimes we think everything needs to change because it's easier than accepting that we need to change, and then doing something about it. ~Lori Deschene

The Seven of Cups suggests frustration and the emotional intoxication that results. Wishful thinking and self-delusion might help us escape reality for a short time, but eventually our illusory bubble will burst. To borrow a teaching from Shantideva, when we attempt to walk barefoot and sharp rocks hurt our feet, we become insulted. Yet isn't it easier to put on a pair of shoes than demand the earth be wrapped in leather? The Father card represents Joseph who took care of Jesus as a child. He represents the ability to be selfless and to do the work that must be done without the hope of reward or fear of punishment. When the focus of blame and grievance transforms into accountability for ourselves, we can create meaningful change.

It's Fluid, Not Solid

From the Mary-El Tarot, the Ten of Swords; from the OH Cards, Amputation/Father:

          At first glance, White's Ten of Swords makes me think of the Death card, but in one sense that is what is happening. Her booklet describes this card as a liberation from 'mental prisons.' I'm currently taking an online course with Pema Chodron that includes lessons about how we self-identify with our emotions and stories that challenges bring. Chodron has chronic fatigue, which is similar to having the flu all the time. She describes how easy it is to add suffering on top of it instead of just being with the painful experience itself:

Just that, that’s enough, but the majority of us, we don’t just leave it at that. Then it’s like, “But I used to be able to do all of this, and I could do all these things, and now I can’t do any because I’m in bed all the time.” So the pain of having the illness just gets exaggerated by feeling so disappointed that your identity has been demolished. And then along with that is what everybody else is going to think of you now, because they always thought I was this great accomplisher, and now I’m this sickly person who can’t do anything. It’s the thoughts that are like the bricks and mortar of our personality, that keep it solid and don’t allow us to experience the dynamic, fluid quality. 

When part of it is true (the experience itself), it's easy to believe and identify with the emotions and stories that are just passing through the mind and are not actually solid and permanent. Amputation/Father is a good example in my case. I've had three fathers in my lifetime, and I've created a self-identity around each one: my biological father (the abandoned child), stepdad #1 (the abused stepchild), and stepdad #2 (the accepted stepchild). What a lighter load I would carry if I could just say "Yes, that happened" rather than carrying the heaviness of those self-created stories.