I use tarot and oracle cards as tools for reflection and contemplation. Rather than divining the future, they are a way for me to look more deeply at the "now."
"The goal isn't to arrive, but to meander, to saunter, to make your life a holy wandering." ~ Rami Shapiro

Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Jabbing Myself

From the Tarot of the Hidden Realm, the Three of Swords; from the Heart of Faerie Oracle, the "Heartless Love:"
The Swords card shows a woman somewhere other than the present. She is so unaware of what is going on around her, she has no idea the thorns on the rose stems are making her hand bleed. Many times I have replayed the actions and words of someone who hurt me over and over in my head. I've told and retold my story of anguish to anyone who would listen. And my heart never healed, it only relived the pain. While I don't believe I'm responsible for another person's behavior, I am responsible for my reactions to it. Yes, there does need to be a time for grief, but at some point I need to step out of the past and back into the present.
The Frouds point out that while fairies may be fascinated by humans, they don't have the same kind of emotional connection as can develop between humans. I've been in friendships and had lovers who were looking for fun and excitement, but who could care less about commitment and loyalty. These people either were incapable of long-term relationships or just didn't want to deal with any bumps and potholes that came with such bonds. Both these cards point out (in not so subtle ways) that having false expectations about other people can lead to heartache. And if I want the pain to stop, I'm going to have to be the one to change. 


  1. Isn't this a stunning depiction of the Three of Swords? "I'm going to have to be the one to change."That is the core essence of this post for me. Retelling my story; O boy I was so good at it! But accepting and letting go was a whole different phase of grief. That is when the healing truly begins. We have to accept responsibility for our own happiness. and then the sun will come out again

    1. Years ago the therapists used to encourage, "Get your grief out!" Which was fine, except I just kept wallowing in it, getting angrier at the world. It was an awakening for me to learn EVERYONE at some point feels like this, it wasn't personally directed at me. That kind of dissolved a lot of my hurt and indignation. :)