From the PetraK Tarot, the Five of Swords; from the Astrodice, "Pluto/Sagittarius/9th House:"
In the PetraK painting, the central sword is pinned down at the hilt while two other swords prevent any forward or backward motion. This is defeatist thinking at its worst; something negative happens, then suddenly all opportunities are avoided because of a fear of failure or loss. I know exactly why I drew this card today - I'm leading the meditation group tonight. Lately for every meditation I do, there is always someone who doesn't like it. If I do a listening meditation with ocean waves, someone tells me they prefer a guided meditation to keep their thoughts on track. Then when I do, someone else tells me there was too much talking. They request relaxing music with no words, but the music doesn't suit some folks (none of whom want silence only). It has been frustrating, and I do feel like giving up.
The roll of the dice pairs the transforming change of Pluto with the good-humored honesty of Sagittarius. The 9th House implies a search for meaning, which fits well with my feelings of frustration. Yet the Planet and Sign suggest if I want things to be different, it's going to require me to explain how I feel. But I must be careful that I don't lash out in anger ("If you don't like it, then maybe
you should do it!") or try to lay a guilt trip on anyone. Perhaps the biggest change should be with me - I need to stop taking things so personally.
Oh that's a tough situation to be in. I was struck by the irony of the phrase "none of whom want silence only". Sending a breath of equanimity your way, my dear. xo
ReplyDeleteMy personal meditations are done in quietness (unless it's outside doing a listening meditation), but this group seems to want to be entertained. I'm trying not to judge; everyone has their own way of being mindful.
DeleteYour latest sentence is a wise but difficult one. And don't forget Bev you are the teacher so you know best how to vary your meditations. And If they don't like it maybe they should seek their solace somewhere else.
ReplyDeleteWishing you lost of patience with your group and even more love and compassion for yourself (((Bev)))
Thank you, Ellen. I'm more of a chairperson than teacher in this group, so though I do lead, I still must be willing to listen to their feedback. Yet I should know by now that you can't please everyone all the time! :)
DeletePeople. can't live with them can't shoot 'em.
ReplyDeleteHeehee, thank you for that load-lightening laugh. :)
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