I Know Nothing

From the Touchstone Tarot, the Wheel of Fortune:

The wheel in this card is from a painting by Fra Angelico called The Vision of Ezekiel.  The outer wheel contains prophets from the old testament of the bible with words from the first few verses of Genesis: "In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth."  The inner wheel includes people from the new testament with the first verses in John around it :"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God."  The wheel within a wheel helps me to remember that when I uncover one mystery, another waits in its place.  Things will unfold that may help me understand, but there will always be dozens of more doors to open when that understanding arrives.  As the paper at the top of the wheel implies, I'll never graduate from learning.  Not only is change constant in the outer world, it is also present in my inner world as well.

     From the Oracle of the Grail Code comes "Emotions:"

This appears to be a lovely scene until the bars on the window are noticed.  This painting was created by Evelyn De Morgan and entitled The Prisoner.  Fearful emotions have held me in a prison these past few days, sucking the energy from my body and mind.  Yet when I look at them realistically, I find that 99% of my anxiety comes from assumptions, expectations, and projections.  Basically, they are not real.  And even if my worst fears come true, do I absolutely without a doubt know that the result could be a terrible thing?  No, I don't; it might even bring a type of freedom...

Steadiness of Mind

From the Touchstone Tarot, the Six of Wands:

Seeing the expression on this young man's face reminds me of when I was in my early twenties; I was full of confidence, headstrong, and sure that the world was just waiting for me to conquer it.  And indeed, this fellow crowned with a laurel wreath has faced his challenge and triumphed.  The stag on the pennant represents his self-assurance, but the tip of material may hint at another meaning.  It circles around with the tail pointing downward, reminding me of the wheel of life.  Enjoy and celebrate your success young man, but realize that there will be other tests and obstacles to overcome.  The goal is not to finally get everything (and everyone) permanently fixed to my liking, but to ride the ups and downs of life with equanimity.

     From the Oracle of the Grail Code comes "Temperance:"

If you look carefully at this woman's feet, you'll see flames of fire spreading around her.  No wonder she needs that jug of water!  Some art scholars have interpreted this painting of Temperantia by Sir Edward Burne-Jones as a woman trying to put out the flames of passion.  That interpretation reminds me of the misunderstanding some folks have of the Buddhist term "equanimity."  This word doesn't mean to live with "flat" emotions, never feeling happy or sad, appreciative or disappointed.  It means accepting situations in the moment without going into a tailspin, because I understand that everything is transient.  I don't emotionally attach my happiness to my definition of what is good (willing it to never change), nor do I fear that what is bad will last forever.  I maintain my balance no matter what is swirling about me - steadiness rather than an extreme reaction.

Endings and Fresh Starts

The new deck I'll be using this week is the LE Touchstone Tarot by Kat Black.  This morning's draw is "Death:"

The source of this image (minus the skeleton) is from a painting done by Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio entitled Death of the Virgin.  Caravaggio's work cause quite a stir with the church, because it depicted the death of Mary as ordinary rather than a portrayal of her rising to heaven surrounded by cherubs.  I am reminded by this card that the normal flow of life to have both a beginning and an end.  It is not a form of punishment, it is just the circle arcing back around to meet its beginning.  Everything is a part of nature and follows this cycle, though on a personal basis, accepting this law is rarely easy.

     The other new deck I'll be using this week is the Oracle of the Grail Code by Amy Sophia Marashinsky.  Today's card is "Service:"

Here is another painting of Mary (Madonna Litta) attributed to Leonardo da Vinci.  It is interesting that this one (birth and life) is in stark contrast to the one above (death).  Marashinsky makes a wise statement in her companion book: "If your service is not bringing a feeling of being blessed, then it is time to let go of negative beliefs surrounding your service and/or choose another more nurturing way for you of giving service."  At first glance, her words may sound a bit self-centered.  But if my service causes me to feel resentful and "put-upon," then it is not really service - it's just me trying to earn some brownie points.  I need to find what brings me joy because that is what I really want to pass on to others.

A Nice Stop on the Journey

From the Cosmic Tarot, the World:

This tarot card often represents completion and competency.  The angel, lion, bull, and eagle symbolize the four fixed astrological signs, the four elements, and the four tarot suits.  The many pieces of the jigsaw puzzle have been gathered and assembled into a whole.  There is a sense of fulfillment and understanding that reaches far beyond the ego's grasp.  The roses swirl around the dancing woman as does the water, implying that she has found a way to flow with rather than fight the current (which has led to her development).  The shepherd's crook she offers up to the Universe - she no longer feels a need to control people or things, nor does she need to use them as a crutch.  Of course this is not the final destination; it is just one stop as other frontiers are explored and other gateways open.

     From the L'Oeil de Lotus comes "Loyalty:"

Take care of a dog's basic needs, add in some quality time of play and love, and you'll have a friend for life.  Yet dogs who have been treated cruelly will react in kind.  Loyalty does not mean blind obedience, but dedication and commitment.   Regardless of the goal, I need to be prepared to put in a steadfast and devoted effort.  The ball beside the dog is another reminder that I must be a team player in this effort, rather than a coach or referee.  My goal is to learn, not be a guru.

The Full Monty

From the Cosmic Tarot, the Seven of Pentacles:

The title of this card might as well be "When the Best Laid Plans All Go to Hell in a Hand-basket."  This particular version definitely leans toward the Thoth interpretation.  Poor fellow, there's no harvest here, just rocky, bare ground.  I know just the kind of disappointment he feels.  Yesterday, groundwork that I've been laying for over a month finally saw results.  But not the results I wanted to see.  It was painful and broke my heart.  I know sometimes the ground must be cleared and plowed before anything will grow, which requires time, work, and a willingness to deal with the unpleasant.  I'm not giving up, but I need to let go of the "happily ever after" idea I've been holding onto tightly.

     From the L'Oeil de Lotus comes "Wisdom:"

The lotus flower is often used as a symbol of wisdom and enlightenment because of the way it grows.  It begins in the mud (the physical), progresses through the water (the emotional), and finally breaks the surface of the water to rise into the air (the mental).  Only after passing through all three stages does it open to the light (wisdom).  I am reminded that I don't receive wisdom just by reading a book, planting a garden, or talking about my moods.  All of these actions are positive, but I need the "Full Monty" - experiencing, feeling, and thinking - to find what I truly seek.

Movement and Moods

   From the Cosmic Tarot, the Chariot:

This fellow is moving at top speed down a rocky road.  Though the horses that pull his chariot look different, they both seem intent in heading in the same direction.  There are times when I have the energy to do things, but my mind and mood don't want to cooperate.  Then there are the days when I am enthusiastic about ideas for a project, but feel exhausted and can't bring myself to do much of anything.  It is wonderful on those days when I am emotionally, physically and mentally on the same page, and regardless of the "rocks" in the road, I can succeed in getting much done.

     From the L'Oeil de Lotus comes the "Moon:"

The phases of the moon around the earth speak of cycles and changes.  I can't help but think it also is a hint about the head space I've been in lately.  Menopause has made me feel like someone has given me drugs I didn't ask for.  I'm learning to deal with the hot flashes (more appropriately described as hot tsunamis), though they wake me constantly all night long and interfere with my sleep.  My moods have been eratic, going from serene to feeling like I am walking around with no skin on.  There have been days when I've had to put myself in "time out" for the protection of all those around me.  But as the card suggests, it is a phase not a permanent condition - thank goodness.

Stubbornness and Stabilization

From the Cosmic Tarot, the Prince (Knight) of Pentacles:

Of all the knights in tarot, this is the one who will see projects and promises through to the end.  He's loyal, dedicated and practical, but he's got another trait as well - stubbornness.  Look at the way he has his arms crossed (and the bull on the hill over his shoulder); he's not going to give an inch.  Yet he is not being obstinate just to prove a point - this side of his nature comes out when he feels like he is being bullied or manipulated.  He can withstand angry rants, tearful pleading, or intellectual attempts to make him feel stupid.  If he thinks he is doing what is right, he will not back down.  Plus, he has a few surprises that he's kept under wraps (see the way he hides part of the pentacle?).  Come what may, this card suggests I need to keep going until I reach the finish line.

     From the L'Oeil de Lotus comes "Stabilization:"

It doesn't require too much thinking to figure out what this card represents.  The heavy anchor on the bottom of the ocean reminds me to be grounded rather than bobbing helter-skelter in a sea of emotions.  Down on the sandy bottom, there is a sense of peace and detachment.  Let the waves crash above as they will - I don't have to get caught up in them.