To Trust

This week I'll be using the Idiosyncradeck Tarot, created and self-published by Jessica Bott. Along with it, I'll be drawing from the Mixed Emotions Cards, created by Petra Martin with Kris Wiltse (Illustrator) and published by Heron Lake Press. Today's draws are the Queen of Swords and Trusting:

The Queen of Swords prefers truth that is grounded in the reality of hard evidence. She may come off as cool and uncaring, but she actually wants people to be able to come to grips with their life, however it may show up. Like the tree's star-shaped flowers, she shines a light on our fantasies, denials and delusions so that we can step out of them and begin acting with a purpose that can produce a beneficial result. But our fabrications and the figments of our imagination can be comforting, making it awfully hard to leave our cozy bubble. 'Trusting' brings to mind a quote by Nelson Mandela: "Problems can only be solved if one is part of a team." Finding a person or people we can trust and share our struggles with means the possibilities for a solution can become doubled or tripled. We also find the emotional support needed to deal with world rather than run from it. 

You won’t understand what I mean now, but someday you will: the only trick of friendship, I think, is to find people who are better than you are—not smarter, not cooler, but kinder, and more generous, and more forgiving—and then to appreciate them for what they can teach you, and to try to listen to them when they tell you something about yourself, no matter how bad—or good—it might be, and to trust them, which is the hardest thing of all. ―Hanya Yanagihara

In the Sunshine

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Sun; from the Southernisms Oracle, "Can't never could:"

A young man rides a painted horse through a sunflower field. He literally radiates energy and confidence because he can see clearly now. Aware of his assets and weaknesses that experience has shown him, he moves forward with new knowledge and a lighthearted sense of joy. He rides without any pack of 'what ifs' attached, allowing each moment to unfold. The Southernism of "Can't never could" means allowing negative thoughts to form a committee in our head that will defeat us before we ever get started. Those old mental tapes of invalidating and gloomy narratives need to be discarded every time they start playing if we want to enjoy our time in the Sun.  

Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.

~Louisa May Alcott

The Pain of Learning

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Novice of Oysters (Page of Cups); from the Southernisms Oracle, "Pitch a hissy fit:"

Seasoned oyster shuckers know to always wear a heavy glove on the hand that holds the shell to prevent what has happened to this young man. As a metaphor, he represents folks who haven't learned that some relationships can be painful. The 'hissy fit' card suggests someone having a hysterical outburst. Such a tantrum is generally tied to entitlement - either feeling that one didn't get something deserved or feeling that one shouldn't have to deal with what one did get. I can just imagine someone lambasting this young boy for being stupid and careless with the knife. In the matters of the heart, he could get pummeled with "I told you she was trash." But the reality of it is that he is hurt (whether hand or heart), and what he needs most is compassionate help. He doesn't need a lecture to learn, as the pain will do that on its own.

Thinking back on it all, it must have been the most difficult part of mothering she ever had to do: knowing the outcome, yet feeling she had no right to keep me from charting my own path. I thank her for all her virtues, but mostly for never once having said, "I told you so."

~Erma Bombeck 

Begin Again

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Seven of Oaks (Wands); from the Southernisms Oracle, "You've got gumption:"

A young hunter, looking to bring home some venison for supper's stew, finds herself the hunted. She knows a wild boar (made huge through her fear) is an aggressive animal prone to viciously attack humans or other animals. Egan relates this Seven of Wands to those who were previously considered skilled in an area and now have some severe competition. It can be difficult to be good at a job or have talents in certain areas and then suddenly find that others with newer skills are more sought after. At my age, I find it easier to learn informative knowledge than to learn procedural knowledge (how to do something). Yet the Southernisms phrase seems to cheer us on with "You've got gumption." Gumption was a term borrowed from Scotland that in the South came to mean boldness, resourcefulness and having initiative. If we enough curiosity, courage and commitment, we can learn new skills, even if it takes us a little longer. As Rich Karlgaard, author of Late Bloomers wrote, "Our brains are constantly forming neural networks and pattern-recognition capabilities that we didn’t have in our youth when we had blazing synaptic horsepower."

Try recalling what it felt like to learn how to do something new when you didn’t really care what your performance of it said about your place in the world, when you didn’t know what you didn’t know. It might feel like a whole new beginning. ~Margaret Talbot

Willful Ignorance

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Empress; from the Southernisms Oracle, "Go off half-cocked:"

Egan's Empress is a crawmaid - part human, part crawfish. Crawfish are found in freshwater streams, rivers and ponds. Being very susceptible to water pollution, scientists monitor them in the wild as a warning system for pollutants in natural bodies of water. Emotion/water is the world in which the Empress lives, and she prefers that world to be pure - filled with beauty, kindness and the generosity of creating and giving. Unfortunately, humans are generally consumed with their own wants; dealing with such folks can make us want to "go off half-cocked." Half-cocked was a position on flintlock guns that was a sort of safety mechanism. But if they were dropped or bumped, it was easy for them to accidentally fire. This phrase means not to act prematurely, without the necessary knowledge that would be required in the circumstances. The Empress might give the self-centered a chance to redeem themselves, however, if their behavior is based on a lack of information and not simply willful ignorance.

There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn't true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true. ― Soren Kierkegaard

Not So Common Sense

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Seven of Oysters (Cups); from the Southernisms Oracle, "You could throw yourself on the ground and miss:"

Common sense is not so common. ~Voltaire

Everyone wants to find the pearl in their oyster - that magical thing that makes us feel happy and fulfilled. Yet we easily get distracted by what looks shiny and exciting that we jump at it the first chance we get. Soon we discover our prince charming can barely take care of himself, that money can bring Amazon boxes but not happiness, and that fame is as fleeting as the next newspaper headline. "You could throw yourself on the ground and miss" is a saying that indicates a person's common sense isn't being used. If it were employed, we'd soon realize that happiness and fulfillment is based internally rather than externally. We'd stop repeating the same patterns and realize that joy is found in our appreciation of the simple beauties, wonders, and kindnesses that each day brings.

Allow for Simple Contentment

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Sage of Cast Irons (King of Pentacles); from the Southernisms Oracle, "Don't kick the hornets' nest:"

Success is the sum of small efforts - repeated day in and day out. ~Robert Collier

Some folks might look at this King of Coins (Cast Irons) and feel sorry for him, wondering why he looks so happy and proud with a food truck. Such judgments do not come from the kind of people who survived their childhood and had to pull themselves out of poverty through hard work and resilience. This guy may not live in a multi-million dollar mansion and have a car for every day of the week, but he feels the pride of accomplishment; he is successful in his world, able to provide a home and food for his family. "Don't kick the hornets' nest" means to avoid antagonizing or annoying people. Hornets are aggressive and can sting repeatedly, and if we bother other people enough, we are likely to get a similar angry and harsh response. In the King's situation, some folks might imagine they are helping him when they offer unwanted advice, such as he should expand and buy more trucks. It's almost like people aren't comfortable with other folk's simple contentment and quiet joy.