What am I Leaving Behind?

This morning, the first day of the new year, I ask the second question (see previous post), "What do I leave behind?"  From the Daniloff Tarot, the Chariot:

A statue-like figure (that seems to have had its arms broken off) rides in a chariot pulled by a griffin and a unicorn.  On his breast plate is a crab, an astrological symbol that often represents the emotions.  Interesting that I drew the Strength card yesterday and the Chariot today, as I see a connection between the Empress and Strength (dealing with the "heart") and the Chariot and the Emperor (dealing with the "head").  The griffin represents the masculine traits of physical strength and courage; the unicorn symbolizes the feminine traits of innocence, healing, and mercy.  Neither of these are good or bad - different situations require the use of both.  But the emotions can short-circuit these choices.  If I am angry or resentful, I may choose to react with aggression when benevolence would be the better choice.  If I love someone in a needy or insecure way, I may choose to be lenient when a tough stand would be a healthier reaction.  The armless charioteer has learned to use his intellect to control where his feelings might otherwise take him.  As someone who has lived life with a firm grip on her emotional side, pulling this card for what I am leaving behind is a bit unnerving.  Maybe I don't need to hold my feelings quite so tightly...

Stick #89 was chosen from the Kuan Yin Oracle, "The Hidden Jade:"

Who can look

at a simple stone

and see that it hides

a piece of pure jade?

What is real and what is wishful thinking?  I have a confession to make.... I've secretly thought that optimists were deluded, over-emotional Pollyanas.  Not that I consider myself a pessimist - I'd label myself more of a realist.  But in regard to the question and card above, maybe I'm not looking deeply enough at what I think is only a simple rock.  Is there something beautiful inside waiting to be carved from it?  I must learn to see the potential and possibilities of life, not to pin my happiness on, but as a vision to work toward.  Realists can have dreams as long as they are making an effort to materialize them, right?