Just a Small Step

From the Mary El Tarot, the Four of Cups; from the OH Cards, Steps/Threat:

We all have days when we feel like this shell - one moment we're in our element enjoying life and the next we're tossed up on dry sand. We are discontent and lethargic, without the energy to motivate us to action. If we feather a nest for this mood, it will just hang around longer, letting us become comfortable with our discomfort. Steps and the word card Threat suggest that change is needed, but we assume the devil we know is safer than the devil we don't. Yet just taking one small step in a different direction each day, no matter how inconsequential it might seem, will eventually get us to the doorway. Move slowly with determination, and that dark mood will begin to shift too.

Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. You wait and watch and work: you don’t give up.

— Anne Lamott

Forget the Plus and Minus

This week I'll be using the Mary-El Tarot, created by Marie White and published by Schiffer. I'll be pairing it with the OH Cards, created by Ely Raman and Joe Schlichter and published by Eos Enterprises. The OH draw is actually two cards - one a picture and the other a word. Today's draws are the Ace of Cups and Military Parade/Give:

We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give.

~Winston Churchill

This hermaphroditic angel is based on the constellation Aquarius, the water bearer. Rather than seeing the cool water they carry - water that can heal, sustain and nurture - we might get caught up judging the outer package. At that point, any relationship would be superficial, based simply on what we like or dislike. The OH card shows a formation of soldiers drilling, an ancient practice that began when men stopped fighting as individuals and started to fight together as units. The word card combined with it is 'Give,' suggesting selfless rather than selfish action. As Emma Goldman wrote, "If love does not know how to give and take without restrictions, it is not love, but a transaction that never fails to lay stress on a plus and a minus."

Move On

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Seven of Cast Irons (Pentacles); from the Southernisms Oracle, 'That field's been plowed:'

Approach it honestly, assess your performance, and assess the areas where you have fallen short. Correct them and move on. Don't dwell on it. Don't hold on to it.

~Megan Rapinoe

This young man has patiently amended the soil, planted the seeds, watered the sprouts, and carefully managed any pests; his reward is a bounty of ripe tomatoes. I don't know of any gardener - whether they grow flowers, fruits and vegetables, shrubs or trees - who managed to hit a home run the first  time they ever tried to cultivate a plant. It requires a process of mistakes and learning as well as the blessing of good weather. 'That field's been plowed' is a saying that refers to over-thinking and analyzing. If we're so consumed with perfection, we'll miss the enjoyment of the harvest. If we're caught in a loop of trying to find a once-and-for-all solution to a problem, we'll never be satisfied and miss taking any action that might have helped. Move on.

Possible to Fly

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Novice of Oaks (Page of Wands); from the Southernisms Oracle, 'Too big for your britches:'

It is possible to fly without motors, but not without knowledge and skill.

~Wilbur Wright

This Novice/Page has a grand sense of adventure, but not a grain of common sense. Strap on some costume wings, climb a tree, saw off the limb, then float and flutter like a butterfly. What could go wrong? He'll soon get a lesson about gravity and possibly a trip to the ER. Occasionally folks have projects and plans built on desires and imagination, but they lack anything useful that might serve as a foundation to get started. Our enthusiasm may lead us to jump without that practical  parachute. The saying 'too big for your britches' was thought to originate with Davy Crockett when speaking of Andrew Jackson (Crockett disagreed with many of Jackson’s policies, including the Indian Removal Act). It suggests someone who was arrogant with an exaggerated sense of themselves. Yet those who want to make less mistakes and reach more goals will listen to the wisdom of others and acquire they skills need before they jump out of any trees. 

Is It Good?

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Warrior of Cast Irons (Knight of Pentacles); from the Southernisms Oracle, 'Bless your heart:'

This guy reminds me of my eldest stepson who is a chef. Egan writes that this card represents a seasoned expert who is efficient, methodical and organized. A chef's kitchen resembles a sort of arena in which he shouts orders and directions; without such a commander, it would be pure pandemonium. This knight/warrior knows if his efforts are productive by the results they bring. 'Bless your heart' is a Janus phrase, having two contradictory meanings based on the context; it can either be a sincere wish or a polite insult. Facial expressions or remarks that follow can offer a clue. For instance, “Bless your heart, those clothes will surely make you look memorable.” In this Knight's case, words offered as an evaluation may not be a sincere representation of his work. Consider the product rather than the flattery or sarcasm.

Anyone who's a chef, who loves food, ultimately knows that all that matters is: 'Is it good? Does it give pleasure?' ~Anthony Bourdain

First One, Then Another

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Two of Cast Irons (Pentacles); from the Southernisms Oracle, 'Go around your elbow to get to your nose:'

To do two things at once is to do neither.

~Publius Syrus

This poor server is being run off her feet - she's trying to deliver some orders while one man yells for his check and a woman demands her drink be topped off. A busy business is good, except when there are too few employees to help everyone. After a while, frenzied multi-tasking becomes chaos, like using a single trowel in an avalanche. 'Go around your elbow to get to your nose' is a phrase used to describe people who overly complicate things, such as adding so many details and offshoots to a story that the point is lost. When we're overwhelmed, we often have added distractions that keep us from being productive. As Lee Iacocca wrote, we need to prioritize: “If you want to make good use of your time, you’ve got to know what’s most important and then give it all you’ve got.”

Wear a Glove

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Novice of Oysters (Page of Cups); from the Southernisms Oracle, 'As all get out:'

The hands that help are better far than lips that pray.

― Robert Green Ingersoll

If you ever go to an oyster roast, you'll notice that the person who shucks the oysters uses a sharp knife and always wears a heavy glove on the hand that holds the shell. This Novice/Page, while sensitive and kind, hasn't learned the art of safeguards in the world of emotions either. The 'As all get out' card (a phrase meaning going to an extreme) suggests he has become entangled in someone else's drama and taken on their pain. Sympathy refers to pity for another, but keeps us separated from that person. Empathy has been defined as an ability to understand and accurately acknowledge the feelings of another; but in sharing the feelings of another, it is easy to lose one's sense of identity and sink under with them. Yet compassion indicates a deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it. The action (even if it is just sitting with someone who is scared) is the protective glove that keeps us from drowning in the emotional ocean of another person.

Innovative Adaptation

From the Delta Enduring Tarot, the Sage of Cast Irons (King of Pentacles); from the Southernisms Oracle, 'Worn slap out:'

Enjoying success requires the ability to adapt. Only by being open to change will you have a true opportunity to get the most from your talent. – Nolan Ryan

When the pandemic hit our county, we quickly became a hot spot in the country. Restaurant owners fell into two groups: those who mostly cared about making money and ignored the safety ordinances, and those who got innovative so they could stay in business while keeping everyone safe. This King/Sage of Pentacles/Cast Irons reminds me of the second group. He is successful primarily because he can roll with the punches and adapt quickly to whatever is happening. The phrase 'Worn slap out' means to be deflated, used up and completely exhausted. It is the opposite feeling of being slap-happy - a term from boxing meaning to be punch drunk. One of the requirements of being resilient is self-care; we need to carve out some time to nurture our minds, bodies and spirits. No one can keep going when their fuel gauge is empty.

Unedited Version

This week I'll be using the Delta Enduring Tarot, created and self-published by Bridgette Egan. Along with it, I'll be drawing from the Southernisms Oracle (a deck I created based on sayings I grew up with). Today's draws are the Seer of Oysters (Queen of Cups) and 'Playing Possum:'

We think we know our own life, but what we know is only an edited version, colored by our emotions and narrow vision. How close can we come to the original draft?

—Gregg Krech

The Seer of Oysters (Queen of Cups) allows herself to be emotionally open so that others will trust her compassion and insight. Showing us her pearl, she explains that even the things in life that are hard or irritating can be used to make something beautiful and valuable. We don't need to self-identify with the emotions we are experiencing or imagine they will never change. Playing Possum - an involuntary stress reaction that makes opossums appear dead - cautions us not to try to ignore our feelings but to acknowledge them with kindness rather than self-pity. Instead of trying to change our feelings, we can change our perspective, realizing that clinging to any 'shoulds' or 'shouldn'ts' only prolongs our suffering. 

You Never Know

From the Hezicos Tarot, the Three of Rods; from the Way of the Horse Oracle, Lionheart:

Decision is a risk rooted in the courage of being free.

~Paul Tillich

When we expand our world, looking to grow and develop in new ways, there's naturally a bit of trepidation. Yet there is excitement too, and often a feeling of release when we step out of the box we've been in. We wait and watch to see what these new efforts will bring. And as C.S. Lewis wrote, "You never know what you can do until you try, and very few try unless they have to." But few beginning projects and plans go as desired, and Lionheart reminds us to be assertive without being aggressive, to be protective without sacrificing sensitivity. Just because the outcome doesn't replicate our original vision doesn't mean our efforts have failed.

Legacy Burdens

From the Hezicos Tarot, the Magician; from the Way of the Horse Oracle, The Horse Ancestors:

Are you holding on to something that does not belong to you?

~Fai Monaghan

With a large yellow citrine in his hands (a symbol of energy and creativity), this Magician appears to have a laser-like focus. He's collected the resources he needs - including a not-so-helpful cat - so that he bring his ideas into action. Yet the Horse Ancestors card suggests he pause and consider whether what he is about to create will be beneficial to his well-being or if he is unintentionally following ancestral instructions. Legacy burdens are extreme beliefs and feelings inherited from our forebears that create fear and shame if not honored. Examples of these spoken or unspoken rules might be to avoid showing affection, be perfect, don't speak out, or don't deviate from the norm. Instead of manifesting them, we can ask if this belongs to someone else, that was perhaps useful to them at one time, but is no longer valid or appropriate now.

Illusion of Control

From the Hezicos Tarot, the Four of Coins; from the Way of the Horse Oracle, Merlin's Spirit:

Your home is living space, not storage space.

― Francine Jay

When our insecurity is deeply rooted, we might find ourselves desperately holding on to things because we might need them. We have no trust that others might be generous or supportive, so we cling desperately to what we have. There is a big difference between this type of neurotic grip on material possessions and prudence; prudence might be cautious and practical, but it still knows how to enjoy and use these things. Merlin's Spirit shows two stallions, a father and son. Like other herd or pack animals, one leader protects and dominates. But even the horses know that no amount of control or safeguards will create permanent stability and security. As Christopher Willard wrote, "Equanimity arises when we renounce control—or, more accurately, when we renounce the illusion of control."

A New Story

From the Hezicos Tarot, Death; from the Way of the Horse Oracle, Kairos:

There is no real ending. It’s just the place where you stop the story.

― Frank Herbert

Death brings dramatic endings - jobs, relationships, stages of life, geographical relocations, etc. Even though impermanence is the natural course of things, it still seems sudden and shocking. We just expect things to last. But as Herbert says, this is just one story stopping and another beginning. Without invalidating its importance, we leave what's over in the past and start writing a new chapter. Kairos, in the ancient Greek language, meant a critical or opportune moment. It suggests a decisive action based on precision and right timing. The companion book states, "The best-laid plans [including those that are dashed] can distract you from unexpected opportunities. Sometimes you must wait patiently for an opening - then act without hesitation." 

Three Keys of the Wheel

From the Hezicos Tarot, the Wheel of Fortune; from the Way of the Horse Oracle, Transformation:

Griffin's Wheel is surrounded by the four elements of air, earth, fire, and water - representing the power of the mind/communication, the power of the physical/material, the power of passion/creativity, and the power of emotions/relationships. These powers impact our lives externally, and in turn, our personal relationship to them has its own effect. An infinite multitude of causes and effects keeps that Wheel turning, creating change. The Transformation card symbolizes the ability to relinquish restrictive beliefs and rigid patterns that keep us from freedom and joy through our ups and downs. Ken McLeod offers four keys that may help in this regard:

• Stop seeking security (relax and open to the fullness of life; there is no lasting stability or permanence).
•  Let go of expectations for emotional fulfillment (stop wanting people to be someone other than they are).
• Recognize that you are not an entity (without the burden of a fixed identity, you are free to respond naturally and appropriately to any situation you encounter).

The One that Nurtures

From the Hezicos Tarot, the Two of Swords; from the Way of the Horse Oracle, Promise:

May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.

– Nelson Mandela

What do we do when making a decision leaves us caught between a rock and a hard place? Griffin suggests this moment of indecision reflects a time of feeling vulnerable and defensive, which tends to close minds rather than open them. Yet as Omar Bradley wrote, "we are given one life and the decision is ours whether to wait for circumstances to make up our mind, or whether to act, and in acting, to live." Promise, with a painting of a mother and her new foal, represents nourishing new life. It implies that the better choice might be the one that nurtures rather than manipulates (ourselves or others). 

Quality not Quickness

This week I'll be using the Hezicos Tarot, created and self-published by Mary Griffin. Along with it I'll be using the Way of the Horse, an oracle deck and book set created by Linda Kohanov with Kim McElroy and published by New World Library. The two cards drawn for today are the Seven of Cups and Sky of Mind:

The quality of your life is built on the quality of your decisions.

–Wesam Fawz

When we are spoiled for choice, it's easy to choose what we think we'll bring us the quickest satisfaction with the smallest of effort. Or if prone to fantasy, we may build grand expectations of one choice on assumptions with no concrete basis. Griffin suggests patience is needed as well as common sense in making any big decision. Sky of Mind encourages us to be a master of our own mind, allowing emotions and thoughts to come and go like clouds in the sky without attaching to any of them. Rather than focusing on what we believe our life should look like, we see it realistically, allowing discernment to guide us. There is room for possibilities if we don't demand specifics. Instead of being influenced by our grasping or clinging, we can consider Roy Disney's advice: "Decision making is easy when your values are clear."

The Privilege of Wisdom

From the RainShadow Tarot, the Page of Pentacles; from the Liminal Spirits Oracle, Owl:

It is the province of knowledge to speak and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen. 

–Oliver Wendell Holmes 

This Page of Pentacles appears to be an air traffic controller for the planets. Perhaps he is creating a memory palace for his studies. An enthusiastic explorer of his universe, he seeks to know something about everything his senses touch. He'll ask hundreds of questions as he investigates, yet his queries are grounded in the natural world rather than abstract thought. He could care less how many angels could fit on the head of a pin. Owl, while often considered a symbol of wisdom, also represents quietness because of their near-silent flight. They have large wings compared to their body mass, which allows them to glide more often. The comb-like serrations on the leading edge of their wing feathers break up the turbulent air that would normally create a swooshing sound. These two cards suggest listening more to learn more and then applying what is learned to allow our experiences to create wisdom.

Look for the Doorway

From the RainShadow Tarot, the Eight of Cups; from the Liminal Spirits Oracle, Time:

It’s in relationships that our unresolved psychological issues show up most intensely. 

~John Welwood

When our relationships get out of balance or when our emotions are jerking us around like a choke chain, we often attempt to deflect or distract ourselves. We might decide to use affirmations, read a self-help book, or go to a wellness seminar. Yet as therapist Mindy Newman explains, what we're really trying to do is avoid looking at the painful emotions we're experiencing in the present and the patterns that have been going on in the past that we're repeating over and over again. Healthy change is going to require some hard, uncomfortable work; we face our suffering and look at its causes and effects without getting entangled in the mental stories around it. Time reminds us that we can't jump ahead to the good part. The inner work progresses at its own pace.

Don't spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door.

~Coco Chanel

Counter Argument

From the RainShadow Tarot, the Ten of Wands; from the Liminal Spirits Oracle, Fiber:

Our brains have evolved to keep us alive. They’re really good at being anxious, seeing the negative, and what can go wrong, and really bad at seeing the present moment just as it is.

―Anthony Tshering

If we are devoted to anyone or anything, there will be times when we feel overburdened, when we feel that our efforts and care just cannot keep pace with the need. Yet the Fiber card asks, "What thoughts are we weaving into with our actual experience?" Our projections and assumptions can make the weight on our shoulders feel much, much heavier than it is. But we can counter these thoughts with more realistic ones: Nothing lasts forever; things change. There are resources and hands to help if we're willing to reach out. Even when our lives are filled with busyness, there are still beauty and small wonders to be seen.

A Flashlight in the Forest

From the RainShadow Tarot, the Page of Cups; from the Liminal Spirits Oracle, Forest:

You don't blast a heart open. You coax and nurture it open, like the sun does to a rose.

―Melody Beattie

While all the Pages are curious, the Page of Cups is more sensitive in his interactions. There is no pushiness or demands, only tender questions and gentle responses. He seems to have been born with the ability to listen and empathize deeply. The Forest card's meaning is akin to the USNPS motto: “Take nothing but pictures, leave nothing but footprints.” In other words, be respectful. Yet it also warns us to keep our wits about us and not get lost. In the forest of emotions, it can be easy to get entangled in someone else's feelings while trying to be helpful. Psychoanalyst Robin Stern suggests: "One way to ensure you are taking care of someone you love while keeping track of your own feelings is to convert excess empathy to compassion. When a friend is distraught, instead of assuming the feeling of distress yourself, take a breath and a step back and say, 'That sounds so awful. Is there something I can do for you?'”

War and Peace

From the RainShadow Tarot, the King of Cups; from the Liminal Spirits Oracle, Environment:

"How come we play war and not peace?"

"Too few role models."

― Bill Watterson

The King of Cups is so at peace with himself and others that even the creatures of the natural world don't fear him. He has learned how to use the tools of gratitude, self-reflection and mindfulness; these practices help him acknowledge, accept and let of his distress in order to respond appropriately to each moment. Modeling empathy and emotional stability, he is like a lighthouse to those who desperately need a role model. Environment asks us to look at the people, places and things around us and ask ourselves if they help or hinder our well-being. Are we thriving or simply surviving? Even if we have a stressful job, have we created a sacred space of our home and a refuge in our mind? 

Abjuring the Prescribed

From the RainShadow Tarot, the High Priestess; from the Liminal Spirits Oracle, Honey Bee:

Freedom would be not to choose between black and white but to abjure such prescribed choices. ~Theodor W. Adorno

My eyes are drawn to the small rainbow-colored line between the colors of black and white in this image. Humans prefer things to be cut and dried simply because it gives them a feeling of security, but life is a multitude of color, not just black or white. Buddhists believe that everyone is endowed with buddha nature: a pure, luminous state of our consciousness which is free from any duality or self-referencing. This is what the High Priestess points toward - sinking below the ego to find insight and comprehend the whole of reality. Honey bees are wonderful cross-pollinators, transferring pollen grains from one plant to another. In a changing environment, such pollination enables plants to adapt better than those that are self-pollinated. In the same way, an open mind that sees more than just a slice of life tends to be more resilient and expansive when life serves a plate of the unexpected.

Freedom for All

This week I'll be using the RainShadow Tarot, created and self-published by Claire Mack. I'll also be using the Liminal Spirits Oracle, created by Laura Tempest Zakroff and published by Llewellyn. Today's draws are Justice and Walnut:

I don’t believe you can stand for freedom for one group of people and deny it to others.

―Coretta Scott King

Anthropologist Ruth Benedict wrote that the purpose of her field was "to make the world safe for human differences." Benedict challenged exceptionalism, the view that a certain group was superior to another. She also promoted cultural relativism, the belief that one culture should not be evaluated using the norms and values of another. Justice involves restoring balance and fairness; rather than punishing differences, we can celebrate them. Walnut is a symbol of discernment as well as protection. It's leaves and hulls contain juglone, which is a natural herbicide that prevents the competition of other trees rooting beneath it. Walnut's message is to see beyond our bias, which shrinks our world rather than protects us. Then perhaps we can embrace the vision of Michelle Obama: "Let's invite one another in. Maybe then we can begin to fear less, to make fewer wrong assumptions, to let go of the biases and stereotypes that unnecessarily divide us. Maybe we can better embrace the ways we are the same."

Healing is Hard

From the Osho Zen Tarot, the King of Water (Cups); from the A'HA Oracle, Omniscience:

Whether we realize it or not, it is our woundedness, or how we cope with it, that dictates much of our behavior, shapes our social habits, and informs our ways of thinking about the world.

―Gabor Maté

Some of us come to realize that the wounds we carry are adversely affecting our relationships and development. Those of us who are lucky find a trustworthy friend or therapist who can help us peel back our layers of defense and begin the process of healing. Often those steps can feel like we are creating more suffering and fear rather than less. The King of Cups/Water models the steadiness we need as he escorts us through those stormy seas. Omniscience (with its seven eyes of clarity) represents having awareness, wide perspective, and understanding. If we are to make progress in our emotional recovery, we must learn to speak of our pain without a concentrated focus on blame or guilt. As Richard Rohr wrote, "To finally surrender ourselves to healing, we have to have three spaces opened up within us - and all at the same time: our opinionated head, our closed-down heart, and our defensive and defended 

body."

Without Reserve

From the Osho Zen Tarot, the Three of Water (Cups); from the A'HA Oracle, Tenderness:

The thing that leads to intimacy and relationship and connection is tenderness.

―Greg Boyle

Celebration doesn't depend on circumstances or a special day, but on enjoying the close relationships we've developed. Having a few trustworthy, devoted friends can make even rainy, dark days a bit brighter. But those kind of connections may not be easy to find because we may fear being taken advantage of when we are vulnerable. That is a possibility, but we can at least use those situations to look for any red flags we missed when we dare to try again. Tenderness suggests a heart that is generous, warm and spacious. It is accepting of the whole, even if some parts don't align with our preferences. Such a heart tends to draw other such hearts, creating a small cluster of people who care for each other without reserve.