Kind but Tough

From the Scrying Poetry Tarot, the King of Cups; from the Tapestry Oracle, Journey:

Human kindness has never weakened the stamina or softened the fiber of a free people. A nation does not have to be cruel to be tough. – Franklin D. Roosevelt

          Victoria insists in her haiku that the King of Cups can be kind as well as tough. Compassion doesn't mean we don't hold people accountable for their actions; forgiveness doesn't mean people get a pass for their behavior. Yet as the Journey card shows, walking between passiveness and aggression isn't easy. Anger or hurt usually triggers a desire to escalate or escape. The horse in the waves is a key, suggesting a need for self-care. No one can go without refilling their own cup. As the Dalai Lama encouraged, "if you feel demoralized and exhausted, it is best, for the sake of everyone, to withdraw and restore yourself."

Cloudy Boy, a furry bodhisattva

2005-2021

Wild Comfort

From the Scrying Poetry Tarot, the Five of Cups; from the Tapestry Oracle, Pause:

Even when it seems that all is lost, all is not lost.

~James Ricklef

          When there is loss, the grieving mind and heart grasp and cling to what has gone. It's as if we want to keep that person or thing suspended in time so that we can believe that things have not changed. Our focus is laser-like, pushing everything else away. If we are unable to begin to gradually accept that our loss is part of the natural flow of life, even though heart-wrenching, we can become stuck in an eddy of anguish. We fail to see any beauty, joy, or kindness around us. The Pause card suggests we allow our hearts and mind to rest, allowing them to recalibrate and reset. Rarely does sleep actually help for me in such cases, but Nature is a great therapist. Whether walking or pulling weeds, it reminds me that while there is loss, there is promise of a better day too.

The bottom may drop out of my life, what I trusted may fall away completely, leaving me astonished and shaken. But still, sticky leaves emerge from bud scales that curl off the tree as the sun crosses the sky. Darkness pools and drains away, and the curve of the new moon points to the place the sun will rise again. There is wild comfort in the cycles and the intersecting circles, the rotations and revolutions, the growing and ebbing of this beautiful and strangely trustworthy world. ~ Kathleen Dean Moore

A Time to Act, A Time to Pause

From the Scrying Poetry Tarot, the Six of Wands; from the Tapestry Oracle, Darkness:

          Victoria's free verse for the Six of Wands suggests that it isn't just action that helps us meet our challenges successfully, it's also the ability to attend to details and adjust our trajectory as necessary. It's all too easy to focus solely on the goal instead of what is happening around where we stand. But once we enjoy a taste of victory, the celebration may give way to fear. What waits for us around the next corner? Do we have it in us to go another round? Darkness encourages us to pause and take a time-out. Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche wrote: "There is no better protection than the refuge of unbounded sacred space, infinite awareness, and genuine warmth." In the stillness and quiet, as we let go of our assumptions, projections and opinions, we find that our inner refuge of sacred space is boundless and vast with more possibilities than our mind currently imagines. The inner light of awareness appears as we rest in this openness, bringing clarity rather than delusion or fantasy. Genuine warmth arises as we recognize the nature of impermanence in all things, and trust that no matter what comes, it too will change. 

Shore to the Ocean

From the Scrying Poetry Tarot, the Two of Cups; from the Tapestry Oracle, Devotion:

Without love, we are birds with broken wings.

~ Morrie Schwartz

          Love, more than just romance, is like a magnet to iron. It cannot help but to reach out to the other, feeling that the other's well-being is intertwined with his or her own. It is what helps us rise again and again, when life presses down on us. The Devotion card shows a strong man traveling rough terrain while caring for something precious. Often we don't realize how our tenderness toward another keeps them tethered to hope for change. As someone once said, "To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."

The heart can think of no devotion

Greater than being shore to the ocean - 

Holding the curve of one position,

Counting an endless repetition.

~Robert Frost

Information Gathering

From the Scrying Poetry Tarot, the Page of Swords; from the Tapestry Oracle, Balance:

Information is not knowledge. – Albert Einstein 

          This Page of Swords seems to have a discerning ear. He might collect data (random facts), sort out what is useful information, and then seek to understand if or how it fits together. Yet - as social media can attest - it's easy to string together unrelated bits of information and come up with conclusions that are completely off base. Knowledge allows useful information to be applied appropriately. The Balance card takes this one step further with its "slow and steady" message. Knowledge doesn't equate to wisdom. Wisdom implies sound judgment and the ability to use knowledge ethically; it sees from a wide perspective and from a long-range point of view. It tells that Page to slow his roll on those assumptions he's making and any actions he might consider taking. 

Choosing Freedom

This week I'll be using the Scrying Poetry Tarot, created and self-published by Julianne Victoria. Major arcana cards are haiku, court cards are limericks, and minor arcana are free verse. The other deck I'll be drawing from is the Tapestry Oracle, created and self-published by Kendall Eifler. Today's draws are the Wheel of Fortune and Energy:

One of the finest results of meditation is the increased gap between stimulus and response. That gap before I react gives me time to notice my habitual patterns and sometimes even decide whether to stay a slave to them or break loose. —Brent R. Oliver

          The Wheel's haiku alludes to karma, a concept the West has twisted into something that resembles a system of rewards and punishments. Yet it actually refers to habitual patterns that are created by the intentional choices we make. Once we take an action, we can reflexively repeat it over and over again if we do not bring awareness to the motives driving us. Who hasn't heard someone complain, "Why do I always get involved with the same kind of person?" or "I always end up with difficult co-workers." While there may be outer causes and conditions that are in play, the real key is our own intentional actions (thoughts, words and behavior). The card Energy relates to this as well. Some people seem to seek out emotional chaos while others engage in risky behaviors. Although these patterns might supply us with an adrenaline rush, they soon leave us feeling worse than we did before. So what do we do? We step back into our rut and repeat the same behavior. Yet there is a chance we'll get tired of the merry-go-round we're on and become willing to remain in our discomfort rather than reflexively react as usual. That's the first step to freedom.

Emotional Anchors

From the Sasuraibito Tarot, the King of Cups; from the Soul Cards, Structural Support:

          I can just imagine this elder fellow inviting me to sit in a rocker on his porch while pouring me a cup of tea or coffee. He projects the kind of calm and centeredness that can be an anchor to people who are emotionally upset. Studies have shown that a tranquil environment is helpful in finding our emotional balance. The Structural Support card implies that the kind of people we lean on in challenging  times can make a big difference. Folks who have the most beneficial effects are not fixers but who willingly bear witness to our pain, listen attentively, and respond with tender honesty and kindness. They tend to say things like:

• You're not alone. I'm here for you.
• How can I help?
• Your feelings are valid.
• This is a process that may take some time, but it won't last forever.

While they might not offer instant solutions, their peaceful presence and faithful friendship can provide the ballast needed to sail through rough seas.

The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing…not healing, not curing…that is a friend who cares. — Henri Nouwen

Temptations of the Mind

From the Sasuraibito Tarot, the Seven of Swords; from the Soul Cards, Nothing to Hide:

Rise above the deceptions and temptations of the mind. This is your duty.

― Sivananda

          This young lady represents defiant deception; we've all experienced it in one form or another. It begins when our mind tells us things like: "They have more than enough and I am in need, therefore I have the right to take from them" or "He's often maligned my character simply out of meanness. I have the right to do the same." Yet as Friedrich Nietzsche said, "The most common sort of lie is that by which a man deceives himself." What we use to convince ourselves that we're taking righteous action is like a dandelion seedhead on a windy day. It's cannot stand up to scrutiny or the truth. Even worse, deceptive actions are seeds on the breeze; once planted, they bring a crop of similar behaviors. Nothing to Hide suggests considering how our reasoning would look to others if it were laid bare before all. It's easy to rationalize in our own mind, but it can look very different when we say it out loud to other people.

Help Wanted?

From the Sasuraibito Tarot, the Knight of Pentacles; from the Soul Cards, Help Wanted:

         This guy isn't a stranger to hard work, neither does he whine or complain about it. He's very disciplined and meticulous when it comes to getting a job done. In fact, because he's excellent at what he does, he's never without something to do. But the Help Wanted card shows his weakness - he's so stubbornly independent that he and has to be nearly sucked into a black hole of overwhelm before he raises his hands in surrender. Perhaps he has, as Brene Brown said, "mistakenly fallen prey to the myth that successful people are those that help rather than need, and broken people need rather than help." Yet asking for support when it is needed is a mark of honesty and wisdom, not weakness.

Bearing Witness with Love

From the Sasuraibito Tarot, the Lovers; from the Soul Cards, Breaking Free:

Our choices determine our fate. ~Robert Place

          Investing in a relationship changes us when it is supported by a deep commitment based in love. It tests and stretches us, yet we also find that such vulnerability and openness can fill us with a joy and contentment that is rare. But the other side of the coin is found in Breaking Free: what happens when loss or change threatens that bond? Do we find ourselves wanting to sprint away as quickly as possible to protect our heart? I am currently the caregiver of a 16 year old cat in rapidly declining health. Because he is not in pain (and because he has always been terrified of the vet), I have made my bedroom into a hospice to allow him to pass where he is most comfortable. My heart sinks as I watch him continue to weaken. And if I am honest, my head tries to convince me that if I have him euthanized I won't have to bear witness. But I know this is not the right choice for him - to die surrounded by bright lights, harsh smells and loud noises at the hands of a stranger. Love doesn't let the other - whether person or pet - go through the hard stuff alone.

What Are We Waiting For?

From the Sasuraibito Tarot, Judgment; from the Soul Cards, Moving On:

Change will not come if we wait for some other person or some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek. ~Barack Obama

          Many hear the call to rise and go forth. But it can feel mighty comfortable wrapped in our soft quilts, hidden in our little cocoon. Yet once our hearts and minds have been opened, pretending to ignore the inner prodding to act will become more difficult. As Moving On suggests, its time to spread our new wings and test them out. Time stands still for no one; the present is constantly becoming the past. In the words of Seneca, "Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end."

What are you waiting for?

Places and People

From the Sasuraibito Tarot, the Four of Wands; from the Soul Cards, Protective Wing:

Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again.

~Joseph Campbell

          This Four of Wands reminds me of a greenhouse protecting whatever rests inside against the winter cold. So much happens in the outer world that we can't control or change; it helps to have a sacred place where we can center ourselves and rest. Whether a man-made structure or nature-made one, it is usually always a personally chosen one. The Protective Wing card implies that it's not just places that offer refuge, it's also people. Like the Snickers commercial that says "You're not you when you're hungry," it often applies when we're angry, lonely or tired. Having a wise friend who can guide us back to calm and sanity during chaotic or challenging times is an invaluable treasure. As Buddha told his followers: "Admirable friendship, admirable companionship, admirable camaraderie is actually the whole of the holy life." Truth and tenderness can go a long way in keeping us upright when we're listing to one side.

Unexpected Jabs and Gifts

This week I'll be working with the Sasuraibito Tarot, self-published by Stasia Burrington. I'll also be using Soul Cards 1 & 2, created by Deborah Koff-Chapin and published through her company, Center for Touch Drawing. The Soul Cards have no titles, so the ones given here are my own. Today's draws are the Five of Swords and The Gift:

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. ~Max Ehrmann

          Brag, pontificate, shock and stir-the-pot - these seem to be the main motives for people posting on social media these days. While looking for an obit of an acquaintance on Facebook this morning, I ran across a post by a relative who seemed to think that Asian American hate was something made up by liberals. My first thought was to add a few daggers to my own fingers and reply that his white male privilege was showing. But then I had to pause and ask myself, would that help and heal or inflame and cause more aggression? Such a comment would just show my own hostility and create more hatred. But how do I channel this energy in a healthy way? The Gift shows an angel-like figure giving a flower to a person whose world has gone dark. I too can offer unexpected kindnesses to those who are struggling. It may simply be by asking "How can I help?" It's surely a better alternative than trying to win a battle based on hatred.

Aggression only moves in one direction - it creates more aggression.

~Margaret J. Wheatley

Embodied Experience

From the Ellis Deck, the Nine of Swords; from the Brownies Oracle, Entanglement:

 ...the path is only accomplished through the body. It is also why we have the Zen saying, “You cannot wash off blood with blood.” That is, you cannot change your mind—your way of seeing—with the mind alone. ~Meido Moore

          If I am anxious before bedtime, I might try reading something uplifting, praying, or chanting Julian of Norwich's phrase "all will be well." It's easy to forget that worry is also carried in the body and will hijack the brain to make sure I stay on red alert. I recently heard a Zen teacher say that people often try to calm themselves with meditation and then complain because it was too hard to focus. He explained that we should start with the body - using a body scan or lengthening our exhales - to allow the body to relax first. Entanglement illustrates the mind-body connection, reminding me of Bernie Siegel's words: "The mind and body are not separate units, but one integrated system." There's no trying to please the one and ignore the other.

 It is through sensations of the body that it actually becomes relaxed—not by concepts and words.

~Guo Gu

Each a Special Kind

From the Ellis Deck, the Queen of Rods; from the Brownies Oracle, Immersion:

The artist is not a special kind of person; rather each person is a special kind of artist. 

– Ananda Coomaraswamy

          This lovely Queen of Rods knows how to notice and nurture the creative spark she discovers in everyone. She'll give a gentle push to the timid to dip their toes in, then will cheer and encourage them when they do well or when they flounder. She knows making mistakes is part of the process. The Immersion card suggests that the biggest stumbling block to finding our creative niche is jumping in. While a teacher or training classes might help us, our fear of failure can keep us from stepping out of study mode into actually testing the waters. Perhaps we should consider our creative endeavors as 'purposeful play,' such as Maslow suggested. Creativity is more fun when we take risks and experiment instead of worrying about all the rules.

Unruly Be-ing

From the Ellis Deck, Strength; from the Brownies Oracle, Community:

Unruly beings are as unlimited as space

They cannot possibly all be overcome,

But if I overcome thoughts of anger alone

This will be equivalent to vanquishing all foes.

― Shantideva

          Inner strength could be defined as an enduring source of calm fortitude that allows us to see things clearly and deal with them sanely. How do we cultivate this trait? The Buddha suggested wise attention (through mindfulness and meditation); these practices allow us to recognize how fleeting and precious life is as well as how so much of the suffering we experience is rooted within our own mind. These insights lead to a wider perspective and lessen our knee-jerk reactions. Community suggests a concern for the well-being of one's fellow beings. Most communities are made up of people with a variety of religious, political and social, and environmental interests. If we want to play a helpful role, calm fortitude can aid us in keeping out extraneous views and opinions that have nothing to do with the task at hand.

Cranky Old Friend

From the Ellis Deck, the Hanged Man; from the Brownies Oracle, Thin Ice:

          Little flames encircle this hanging bunny; there's nothing that gets peoples dander up like realizing they have no control over a situation. The city in its wisdom has declared a corner of my backyard as their own, and so they will remove fencing and shrubs to pave the alley next to us. We had no idea until some strange man was seen hammering stakes in our yard. I've written my commissioner and mayor, but like this bunny, my hands are tied. Buddhist teachings say that the antidote to aggression in all its many forms is patience. In the past, I've managed to escalate problems with aggressive tactics, not solve anything. Patience means I sit with my edgy energy without reacting, ignoring, or pretending I don't feel it. As Constance Kassor explains, "patience is a skill that allows one to pause long enough to see a situation clearly, and then respond to it accordingly." Thin Ice suggests what happens when I feed my frustration with stories and strategies rather than letting it be. A lack of patience (and clarity) are what will land me in icy waters rather than bring resolution. Instead I can sit with my cranky, old friend impatience, and see what I can learn from her.

Integrating Truth

From the Ellis Deck, the World; from the Brownies Oracle, Discord:

If we are to survive, our loyalties must be broadened further, to include the whole human community, the entire planet Earth. ― Carl Sagan

          The World card implies integration - accepting that the mind, body and spirit are all equally important, as well as seeing all beings as a part of the whole. I can remember going through different phases in my life, thinking the intellectual was more important, or the spiritual. There were times when I felt my group was the right one and others should be disparaged for being wrong or ignorant. Yet even as I step through each phase of integration, Discord shows it can return in a different shape or form. In such times, it is helpful to remember Carl Sagan's words: "The truth may be puzzling. It may take some work to grapple with. It may be counterintuitive. It may contradict deeply held prejudices. It may not be consonant with what we desperately want to be true. But our preferences do not determine what's true."

Far Beyond Time and Location

From the Ellis Deck, the Emperor; from the Brownies Oracle, Preparation:

Authority without wisdom is like a heavy ax without an edge, fitter to bruise than polish. 

―Anne Bradstreet

          The Emperor operates with a clear direction to protect, sustain and keep order in his kingdom. Seeing everything in black or white, he's not what one might consider 'cognitively flexible.' Such powerful people are hard to confront. Does anyone ever question his authority? Hidden behind layers of armor, I want to uncover more about him - his values and ethics, his sources for knowledge, and who he serves (a select group, himself, or everyone). The Brownies, having unearthed a potato, have devised a way to move and cook it. Many factors had to be studied and considered in order to take on such a huge task. Before making far-reaching decisions that would affect people or a land he doesn't know personally, does this Emperor do his research? Does he check to see if his information is accurate? The ripple of our words and actions carry far beyond the present time and location.

Swinging Door

This week the tarot I'll be using is the Ellis Deck, created and self-published by Taylor Ellis. Paired with it will be the Brownies Oracle, created and self-published by Doug Thornsjo. Today's draws are the Four of Cups and Interlude:

          The state of in-between, where life is neither pleasant nor unpleasant, can be confusing and often leaves us feeling ungrounded. We seem to be in waiting mode for either sunbeams of joy to illuminate our life or an anvil to fall from the skies on our head. Humans generally know how to dive into happiness or hunker down in a defensive posture, but that stuck in neutral stuff is difficult. Yet the Interlude card is a reminder that this period is an opportunity to relax from the stresses of being overly excited or driven by anxiety. We can just be a swinging door, watching things come and go without getting worked up about anything. 

...leave your front door and your back door open. Let thoughts come and go. Just don't serve them tea.

― Shunryu Suzuki

Two-Way Street

From the Prairie Tarot, the Seven of Cups; from the Medicine Cards, Whale:

          A man stares at a blank canvas while multicolored cups dance above him. Where will he find emotional fulfillment - that person, group or purpose that could bring meaning and joy to his life? All the cups except one seem to be tilted so that anything in it would spill out. My guess is that these are avenues that have been tried before and found wanting. But the mind and heart like the familiar, and he might have a go one more time just in case it is different this go-round. The majestic Whale brings to mind a quote from Carl Sagan: "For most of their history, whales may have established a global communications network." Unfortunately, noise pollution in the oceans has disturbed the haunting songs of whales. Humans also have a communication problem, but theirs can't be blamed on anything outside themselves. We seek what we want and think will bring us happiness, but forget it depends upon a relationship with others. Do we bother asking them what they desire and expect? Do we discuss what we each are willing to give rather than just get? Relating requires connecting, and it's a two-way street.

If That's the Test Drive...

From the Prairie Tarot, the Ace of Coins; from the Medicine Cards, Otter:

The first wealth is health.

~Ralph Waldo Emerson

          Last Tuesday, I went for my second Covid vaccination. Later that day, I felt tired but carried on as usual. But about 3:00 am that morning, I had a fever I couldn't manage with ibuprofen or aspirin and felt like someone had beaten me with a bat. I felt unplugged and could barely manage moving from the bed to another room. But yesterday around noon, everything suddenly got better; it seemed like a miracle. I know some people have avoided the second vaccine because they are afraid of similar side effects. But my reasoning is, if that's the test drive, I sure don't want the car. It's one thing to feel awful for a few days, and another thing to be in the ICU for weeks. Playful Otter shows up to remind me not to look at the piles of laundry, the unclean house or the yard chores that have gone undone. I think I'll take his advice and just enjoy the season, at least for today.

Everybody needs beauty as well as bread, places to play in and pray in, where nature may heal and give strength to body and soul. ~John Muir

Open Eyes

From the Prairie Tarot, the Nine of Wands; from the Medicine Cards, Fox:

          When I was young, my family rented a house on a huge farm that included crops and cattle. This fellow reminds me of the cowhands who were constantly checking the miles of fence for rotten boards or downed posts. The cattle would often use the fence to scratch themselves on, inadvertently knocking it over or breaking through. Many nights I spent listening to calves call for their mothers when the cattle broke out and went for a wander. The Fox has been given the keyword camouflage - an indication that observing without being observed might be necessary. Sometimes the information that we need to be aware of only comes when we aren't obvious about seeking it. 

I think we all suffer from acute blindness at times. Life is a constant journey of trying to open your eyes. ~Olivia Thirlby

A Long Lesson

From the Prairie Tarot, the Tower; from the Medicine Cards, Jaguar:

          My immediate thought upon seeing this tarot card was, "Looks like someone got thrown from their high horse." The ego uses arrogance to attempt to build walls of protection, trying desperately to sustain the illusion that it has things under control. But it doesn't really matter how smart I think I am; unexpected events can still toss me up in the air and leave me flat on the ground. Jaguar's medicine includes integrity - acting from one's principles instead of just giving them lip service. I personally have found that without humility, it is impossible for me to practice any spiritual principle. Sometimes eating a little dust can help bring me back to earth, letting my heart and mind open once again.

Life is a long lesson in humility. ~James M. Barrie

Wise Investments

From the Prairie Tarot, the Magician; from the Medicine Cards, Frog:

A great deal of intelligence can be invested in ignorance when the need for illusion is deep.

― Saul Bellow

          In the tarot, there are generally two types of Magicians portrayed: the sleight-of-hand illusionist or a man with his resources on the table who uses them and his mind to manifest his goals. This fellow is obviously a street magician whose purpose is to amaze and entertain. In the real world, he shows up to try to sell us fool's gold - the online degree from a shady college, the pills that melt our fat away, or the oil-anointed candle guaranteed to help us find our true love. Yet Frog appears, croaking to call in the cleansing rain to wash away the illusion of finding an easier, quicker way to our objectives. In the words of Jesse Owens, "We all have dreams. But in order to make dreams come into reality, it takes an awful lot of determination, dedication, self-discipline, and effort."